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certified douchetard

a person that is able to lower your self esteem, express no empathy, and exercise inordinate amounts of shitty behavior in one sitting
by lildaywalker November 16, 2009
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Certified Pounder

One who has the proper credentials for pounding (pounding being anything that involves the sphincter or the vagina); often has hot loads emptied onto the forearm and/or shoulder, hitting the chin adds bonus points.

Also known to break bunk beds while screwing a parole officer having sex for the first time post venerial-wart removal.

One who would be immune to all STDs and STIs, no matter how horridly whorish

One who takes the ring to Mordor (aka Elijah Wood)

One who can make wood look like metal... Is that it?

Also loves to leave woman wet, out of breathe and verbally and/or sexually assaulted.

Finally, one who finds a twenty dollar bill in inconspicuous place, i.e. vaginal walls or fallopian tubes (or in the butt)
Ethan earned his title of Certified Pounder after he became involved in a menage-de-toi with a monkey and a Skype camera... in the butt.
by fatbass October 30, 2011
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Certified STEPPAH

Known for killing people, a person who kills people, the person who is recognized for shooting first and asking questions later.
Me: "I know you not playing me 50/50"!

Them: "If I am, what you gon do bout it"?
Me : "Say less, I'm boutta hit Jose, he deftly a Certified STEPPAH"!
by Shootahdcpassion August 13, 2019
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Certified Justin

When a play is so cracked, that it is nothing short of the internet sensationMy friend Justin”.
Andrew- “That play was cracked, definitely certified Justin”
Austin- *Moans aggressively*
by Idk lmao name December 18, 2020
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Certified Retard

Where you're a real and official retard, so if someone is being more than just a retard they are a
Certified Retard.
Random Guy: Saying Niqka is Racist
Another Random Guy: Your a Certified Retard
by datboi334 May 10, 2021
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certified circus clown

ccc: certified circus clown
definition: Javier leong
by dapenisisbig August 23, 2021
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Certified Deviant

The guy in my Spanish class that looks like hes plotting 24/7
The guy in my spanish class is a certified deviant.
by MushyGrape May 9, 2023
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