Bed shuffle

The little dance you do when you first get into bed and its freezing cold and you need to warm your spot up.

It was so cold last night I must have done and 5 min bed shuffle

by Emnor January 22, 2016

bed count

Something douchebags claim exist even though it doesn't.

1:I want to fuck that girl.
2:No. her bed count is too high.
1:Go fuck yourself.

by Joe The Autistic March 13, 2016

Bed Bug

The scourge of the Earth as far as insects go. The closest thing to a living hell short of a chronic condition or painful disease. A small itchy insect that will cause you to lose sleep to the point where you will verge on the brink of insanity, but after you live with them for a few years you will slowly real yourself back in. Has a strong negative effect on quality of life as a whole, as your work performance will suffer, visitors will find out and never come back or you stop inviting them in the first place (social isolation) and you give up hope for the future as you've gotten rid of almost all your furniture and had your home fumigated several times, but yet, they're still there. If you are allergic (not everyone is) you will NEVER be presentable in public, as you will have red welts on most of the places on your body, such as the back of your arms, the love handle area, around your knees and lower thighs, etc. While sitting idle in your own home, you will rarely ever go two full minutes without itching ever again unless you're moving and active. Without taking some measures to keep their numbers down, you will eventually find that they are traveling in the clothes you're wearing while in public. You'll be checking out some international calling cards at your local Dollar General and look down and see a rust colored bug crawling across your chest. You'll learn to hate them so bad you smoosh them between your fingers whenever you see one.

If I don't get rid of these bed bugs, I may just torch my house and all my possessions and start anew.

by Sifting Through July 23, 2017

Whore Bed

When a mattress is left unmade without sheets and the owner still sleeps in it.

Is that a whore bed in her picture? Bitch needs some sheets.

by yumbigbabe November 4, 2018

geef bed

a completely sexed out bed, usually found at parties and/or in alleys.

you got a geef bed bro!

by pickle ricky November 11, 2018

Bed Jelly

When you ejaculate in your bed and forget to clean it up the day later

Sorry for making you clean up my bed jelly

by Reilly gosling March 3, 2019

Bed Jelly

A substance that’s in your bed

I walked in on my mom cleaning up some bed jelly

by Bed Jelly March 3, 2019