How Christians Read the Bible

By presupposing it's truth and then create a narrative that is parallel to the text and then accepting this adjacent narrative AS TRUTH... Regardless of what the text actually says.

Hym "And then what they do is believe the narrative that is constructed around the text... In spite of the FACT that it is a manifestation of their own mind. So, it doesn't matter WHAT YOU SAY... As long as the conclusion is that the religion is both true and good. And it looks something like this:

Dr. JeepJorp "Flabbity florbity flip flop! Everyone KNOWS that flabbity florbity flip flop and that = the Bible true and good!"

Sheeple "Hey! I'm everyone! You're right! I know that, I mean, come on. Do you think I don't know that flabbity florbity flip flop? Everyone know it!"

Hym "And that's how Christians read the Bible."

by Hym Iam June 14, 2024

Sight reading

When a band performs a piece of music they've seen for the first time and have to listen to each other and adjust on the spot, typically in front of a judge or some form of evaluation.

"Ms. Smith signed a sight reading along with scale test."

by om51406 June 17, 2025

The Dom Read

When a gay kid calls out a arrogant kid for being scum in the card game called mafia.

I have the Dom read.

You do?

Yeah kill him!

by mafioso234 February 18, 2010

read that again

A sentence used by pro-Palestinians on X (formerly Twitter) when they see shocking news about the 2023 Israel-Hamas war that pisses them off.

Israel thinks Hamas = Palestine. Read that again.

by Itz KittyPinkiez June 21, 2024

Don’t Read

When a Hylic is politely trying to keep their thoughts private from a vocal psychic and requests and demands not to be objectives without permission.

Woman one: “Oh he’s nice!”
Woman two: Don’t read please, I didn’t give you permission…
Man one ti Woman two: That wasn’t her giving me the compliment?
Woman two: no.

by Mrs Mrs Mrs November 4, 2022

Comic Read

Is generally for women who are performing a blowjob but due to a disinterest starts to read his underwear (normally comic book related underwear).

I got so bored during the blowjob I started to comic reading his boxers.

by BrokenDragon March 14, 2016

reading

when you fuck a book
and you start cumming in it and pages dissolve

and then you proceed to blow up a plane while a rusty chevrolet is driving on the ground on fire

jhon: was jeffery reading
jeffery: I was driving a plane to blow it up

by john6969696420420420 November 30, 2024