Flaky Salmon

An activity that involves positioning your hand between legs of anyone sitting nearby with a flat palm and slapping hands rapidly between the thighs of the person, preferably someone who would not file a battery claim against you. This supposedly represents an Awkward Salmon struggling out of water.

It can be an performed by an individual when the conversation has died down to the point of awkwardness.

Usually screaming "Flaky Salmon" in a slightly deranged voice is acceptable at this time.

This usually serves to make the situation far more awkward than initially perceived.

Tito: What the F----?!? How's your classes going, DOUG?
Doug: So... Do you like weather?

Tito: .....
Doug: It's crazy... so many people here... potential witnesses.....
Tito: Waiter! What does a black guy have to do to get some "wudder"?
Doug: Give a guy some water-- he's black and he's been through a lot!

Doug: 'Places hands between the thighs of 'Tito' and begins slapping. '

Doug: FLAKY SALMON! JAJAJAJAJAAAA

Tito: .....

Doug: .....

Tito: .....

by dasflyinturtleesq November 12, 2018

Bloody Salmon

When Toby eats out his girl Hailey and she climaxes so hard she bleeds

Damn Toby I saw you gave Hailey a big old bloody salmon last night

by Fishpussy2 May 13, 2019

Lord Simon

A good boi that gets mad and does tantrums and praises the lord for forgiveness and help very Otis

Lord Simon is A good boi that gets mad and does tantrums and praises the lord for forgiveness and help very Otis

by Noonemesseswithromansionis February 9, 2020

tio simon

Tio simon is the best gc on stan twitter with an iconic mascot.

omg have you already heard of the Tio simon gc?? they're truly iconic.

by measf1111 February 28, 2021

Jean-Simon

BRO THATS LEGIT ME I DON'T LIKE FUCKING GRAMMAR TABARNAK

Jean-Simon is the coolest not liking grammar french-Canadian ever

by Jean-Simon (fuck grammar) October 12, 2023

Sock-eye salmon

A form of artificial insemination that involve the one-eyed monster releasing its genetic material in to a sock. The sock is then invirted and inserted (usually via fisting) in to a woman's vagina.

Person1: How is Jamie pregnant with Johnny's baby? I thought they never slept together.

Person2: He didn't! She stole his spank sock and gave herself a Sock-eye salmon!

by Cliford Bauford III November 18, 2010

Pulling a Simon

Pulling a Simon is the act of having meltdown on public transit and screaming racial slurs at people

Yo don't be pulling a Simon right now bruh

by DDBarbie February 14, 2020