handleshoe

Noun: A piece of private information told in confidence which becomes a weapon when the subject of the information falls from grace in the eyes of the person who holds it. The (mis)use of this information for the purpose of a personal attack is always imminent. Often used as an underhanded form of malicious cockblock.

Verb: The leaking/use of this information.

Noun Usage:
Mel: My ex-boyfriend Tyler is untrustworthy
Kayla: Do you have any handleshoe?
Mel: He tattooed a life size human eye on the head of his friend's dick
Kayla: That's pretty private. How would you even know that?
Mel: I've got pics.
Kayla: Of his friend's dick? That is some serious handleshoe material. Let me please see this dick pic.

Verb Usage:
Mel: I fucking hate him. I am going to handleshoe the shit out of him, even if it makes me look equally bad.
Alexa: If you keep handleshoeing people, no one will trust you to tell you anything.
Mel: Then I'll use hearsay and questionable information. I want vengeance, not to contemplate morality.
Alexa: You need a muzzle, woman.
Mel: Then you should try to put one on me, I hear you have a shitload of them.
Alexa: I don't even know what that means!

by BigBOAT March 9, 2011

Handleweights

Handleweights are the correct term for the items of fitness equipment commonly known as "kettlebells". Kettlebells got their name in an elaborate and perfectly executed act of deception that managed to make fools of the entire english-speaking world. Kettlebells are not in any conceivable way related to either kettles, or bells. By continuing to refer to them as such, we are complicit in our own gullibility.

Don't be a fool. Don't be the victim of the ruse of some shadowy, faceless puppetmaster. Call a handleweight a handleweight, not a kettlebell - then people will know that you are someone who knows their shit when it comes to gym equipment.

"My arms are killing me, I've just done a 25 minute snach workout with a 16kg handleweight".

"Handleweights you say? Oh, yes, handleweights. You, sir, are clearly well versed in all aspects of wellbeing. Please accept this cat as a tribute."

Counterexample:

"Excuse me, does this gym have any kettlebells?"

"Kettlebells? This is a place for making muscle. Not tea and clangs. Take your made-up words to a gym where the staff are less gullible."

by Girya August 26, 2013

hangred

Hungry, angry, and tired.

I'm taking diet pills, and I'm hungry,angry,and.I haven't slept in two.days. I'm so freaking hangred.

by cr51 May 14, 2015

Handerpants

Another word for masturbate: to touch yours or others junk

Dude, I was like totally handerpants last night

by Actual trash 🍚 October 1, 2016

handle me like a man

rough or hardcore sex basically to fuck someone hard in bed .

That bitch couldn't handle me like a man with his small cock .

by handle me like a man March 30, 2017

Handie Down

When your girlfriend's older sister gives u a hand job.

..."I was at Julie's last night and got a handie down from Rebecca..."

by Ron VaShon August 25, 2020

Handheld Meat Salad

A #Hoagie or #Submarine Sandwich minus the delicious bread and Rolled in Tasteless Lettuce. Not a sandwich at all.

A #Salad that almost stays together disguising itself as a Sandwich.

A #Lettuce Wrap

Customer: "Hi college dropout... can I get the Number 1 as a Lettuce Wrap?" Sandwich Artist: "Oh you mean the Handheld Meat Salad."

I see you ruined your Sub by ordering it as a Handheld Meat Salad.

by DSeanK May 13, 2021