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Microsoft Works

1) Word processing program by the Microsoft Corporation

2) Oxymoron
1) Microsoft Works sucks, I'm going to get a bootlegged copy of Office.

2) Microsoft works? No it doesn't.
by Nick April 3, 2003
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Microsoft Autoupdating

Constant jizzle for a period longer than 24 hours
Mr. Schachter: "You ok bud?"

T-Dog: "Yeah man im just Microsoft Autoupdating right now that's why I have a fire-hose attached to my cock."
by One-Pump-Shotgun October 8, 2018
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Microsoft Tech Support

A middle-aged man named Vihaan, greets you with the phrase, "Microsoft Tech Support, how may I help you?"
Me: Hi, I got this message and it says to call you.
Vihaan: "Microsoft Tech Support, how may I help you?"
Me: *hangs up*
by XDhobo June 10, 2019
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microsoft tech support

Kid1: My computer won't turn on!
Microsoft Tech Support: Hello my name is Tahim how may I help you?
by RyanTheKid March 31, 2017
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microsoft fanboy

Much like an Apple fanboy, but greater in number. Microsoft fanboys will be very quick to defend anything and everything their favorite company pushes out, even if it's straight up shit. They are obnoxious, plentiful, ignorant, and one of the many forms of cancer on the internet, much like every fanboy out there. Some may argue that Apple fanboys are the worst kind, and this may be true, but they are few and far between nowadays. What people rightfully criticized them for doing in the past, these fanboys do the exact same thing (I.E. pay $3000 for a computer that's barely worth $1500), and there are a lot of them. Microsoft fanboys hate anyone who:

Uses a Mac
Uses Linux
Rightfully criticizes Microsoft on some of their faults
Uses a gaming console
Dares to pose a different opinion

These fanboys also tend to be PC elitists, so they feel morally superior to you simply for using a Windows machine they build themselves, as if it makes them better than everyone else. They also think that computers are only there for gaming. Like Apple fanboys, don't take anything they say seriously. They are full of shit and have no idea how technology works outside the gaming world.
*friendly discussion on an online forum*
User 1: I love how simply OS X works for me. Its GUI is a lot more user friendly and more colorful.
User 2: I agree, although I feel it's too limited for me, so I prefer to use Linux. Similar design and you can do different things on it. It's more my style.
User 3 (fanboy): Both of you are fucking stupid, my $4500 new Surface Studio will blow ANYTHING you do on your shitty Mac or Linux machine for a fraction of the price, despite it being underpowered!!!! WINDOWS 10 IS THE BEST THING EVER!!!!!!!!!!
User 1 and User 2: Fuck, it's another Microsoft fanboy. Time to take this to a PM.
by Antihater November 22, 2016
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microsoft moment

Sudden freeze of all mental functions due to a simultaneous massive overload of sensory inputs (hotties, chocolate, sunsets, doofiswads) and internal stimulation (lust, chocorgasm, rage).

Synonyms are senior moment, brain cramp, brain freeze, brain fart
Guy 1: Dude, she was totally waving you in and you just stood there like a super doofiswad, wtf?

Guy 2: I know, dude. I was having a total microsoft moment.

Chick 1: Omigod, he gave you a can of salted nuts for Christmas? Wtf? I hope you kicked him in the nads.

Chick 2: Couldn't. Got lost in a microsoft moment. Probably gonna just punch in his face tomorrow, though.

Chick 1: Awesomeness.
by Andy is Sassy January 13, 2008
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Microdot

LSD crystal, the size of one grain of salt encased in a tiny pill.

Pill it self has no psychedelic property, it is only used as a means of distribution and administration. Like paper is for liquid form of LSD.
Some one who is not me used a microdot last night.
by Kontsnor July 26, 2014
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