Jacking Off

What a guy will do as often as possible.

My nightly routine involves jacking off, as does my morning routine, and my midday routine.

by Derpherpderpistan February 11, 2013

jack off

To stoke the penis up and down in a motion like if you were to shake milk.

Today when I shook my chocolate milk, after 20 minutes it turned white thanks to the jack off motion.

by Anonymous October 29, 2003

jack off

1. To Masturbate, as in a male.
2. A stupid male (usually "jack-off").

1. I'm horny. I'm going to go jack off.
2. You retard, don't be such a jack-off

by Brown Sugar March 19, 2003

jack off

to look and porn and pop a woody, get some lotion, put a generous amount on your main hand (sometimes other hand if youre looking at porn on internet or computer), grip your penis, then move your hand rapidly up and down the shaft of your penis.

spank the monkey, choke the chicken, beat the meat, yank the yak, masturbate, wank off, whack off, etc.

by sean paul? June 02, 2003

jack-off

1) When an angry mother orders her son (named Jack) off a ride outside Tesco.
2) To masturbate.

1) "Get off the Postman Pat ride, you've been on long enough... JACK, OFF!"
2) "Dude, I am going to jack off."

by Soiled Undergarment August 15, 2003

Jack Off

1. What a man does when his penis erects into a throbbing, veiny, pulsating, kinetic hard-on, stroking the shaft repeatedly up and down with his hand until the penis barfs up massive amounts of white-nut vomit in either a clean, streaming squirt or in a gelatonous, oozing mass.

2. To make one's dick sneeze, throw up, explode, ejaculate, cough up white blood, splooge, climax, orgasm, erupt, belch, detonate, spew, or spit, possibly on another person's face.

3. A person who amounts to nothing, or should not be taken seriously.

1. "Boy, I just watched too much Full House, I need to go jack off".

2. ".. and then she got down on her knees and I jacked off all over her face".

3. "Dude, you need to get up off of your ass and quit watching gay porn, you good for nothing jack off".

by Mr. Friscus February 02, 2010

jack off

if you're under 13: you're not cool enough to know what it means. come back when you wake up and its sticky in your danger zone.

if you're over 13: why the FUCK would you need to look up the definition of "jack off?" did your balls not drop yet?

why the hell would any guy who's hit puberty need to look up what "jack off" means?

by un-dumbassify yourself, please January 03, 2010