Skip to main content

michael angelo batio

Michael Angelo Batio, sometimes called simply "MAB," is the greatest guitarist of all time. With the ability to play upwards of 900 trillion notes per nanosecond on a slow day, he makes makes Herman Li and Yngwie Malmsteen look (and sound) like complete guitar n00bs.

He started as the guitarist for 80s hair band Nitro before going on to start a solo career. He has many custom made instruments and gear, most notably the V shaped double guitar and the X shaped quad guitar. He starred in an instruction DVD series called "Speed Kills," so named because if you attempt anything he teaches on the DVDs (or even watch them for that matter) you will die.

MAB also invented the hairstyle of having it hang in front of you eyes, but the emo subculture stole it from him. As a result, everytime he sees an emo, he punches them in the face with a soundwave.

"The Speed of MAB" is the fastest speed known known to mankind. It is so fast that it is incalcuable by human standards. An object travelling at the Speed of MAB can travel several billion lightyears in a matter of seconds.
-DragonForce pays Michael Angelo Batio not to destroy them.

-MAB originally invented Guitar Hero, but abandoned the project when the product testers exploded trying to play the easiest song.

-An object travelling at the speed of light can get from earth to the moon in 1.2 seconds. That's long enough for MAB to play every song ever known to any man thirty-thousand times each. On a slow day.
by LightningandIce January 18, 2008
mugGet the michael angelo batio mug.

botion

A potion used to become a thot slayer
"Alm, drink this Botion and become a thot slayer" (Naziro)
by wfdvbnghj May 21, 2018
mugGet the botion mug.

Baton Rouge Handshake

The customary greeting between two people in Baton Rouge. One person unsuspectingly sticks their finger into the other's butt hole; only to immediately walk away, never to be seen again.
That girl took Nate onto the dance floor and gave him the ol' Baton Rouge Handshake.
by louisianaLegend February 4, 2021
mugGet the Baton Rouge Handshake mug.

Space-Batin'

Masturbating to pictures in the photo albums of random people on myspace.
I was bored last night on myspace and clicked on some random chick's page. I looked at her photos and did some space-batin'
by Mitch Fletcher January 11, 2009
mugGet the Space-Batin' mug.

Shag Baton

'Man you should have seen her face when i got the old Shag Baton out........She was lovin' it'
by MongyMax December 1, 2007
mugGet the Shag Baton mug.

blaster-bating

(1)masturbating While a stick of dynamites fuse is slowly burning down and you put it out with your load if you dont finish in time you die .
(2) masturbating while riding a rocket.
(3) masturbating while riding a motorcycle
(man one) brah i just heard the news did he really die?(man 2) didn't you hear kooterz died while blaster-bating.(at least he died doing what he loved the dynamite finally beat his por ass) (man one) damn
by c3000b1atch35 April 25, 2010
mugGet the blaster-bating mug.

The Baton

When you are doing doggy style, you pull out yell her name and when she turns around you turkey slap her.
Oi Johnny I gave monica the baton last night
by john luc 911 August 2, 2017
mugGet the The Baton mug.

Share this definition

Sign in to vote

We'll email you a link to sign in instantly.

Or

Check your email

We sent a link to

Open your email