three-up (often spelled 3-up)

A woman that is so beautiful that she causes men around her to achieve an erection by looking at her. (derived from the term "three appendages up.")

Man, check out that 3-up there. She's one hottie!

by quamp July 21, 2003

Offensive Board

When a couple breaks up, but before anyone else can pick up the girl on the rebound, the same guy gets back together with her. The term comes from basketball, where an offensive board or offensive rebound prolongs a team's possession.

Man: I heard Katie and Mike broke up. Finally I can get Katie on the rebound, that fox.

Friend: Nope. Mike grabbed the offensive board and got right back with her.

Man: Curses! I'll box out next time.

by tripleovertime99 December 21, 2010

offensive monkey

Someone who is incredibly vulgar, hateful, and spiteful all the time -- for no reason. Typically, an offensive monkey has no idea that people feel this way about them because they are disconnected from reality.

But you gotta be careful around offensive monkeys, because they are crazy and could snap at any moment, without warning, and bite your fingers off and/or tear your face up.

Sam: Can you believe that douche?

Nick: Yeah man, what an offensive monkey.

by Lima Beaners March 8, 2011

Offence-Tantrum

The act of claiming to be offended by an event that did not attack, belittle or demean any group or person. Taking the misguided idea that no one should say anything that might offend another, in an over -the-top nonsensical way.

"Merry Christmas!"
"Don't you mean, Happy Holidays!?"
"Whoa, calm down, didn't mean to send you off on an offence-tantrum now."

by Ryan+Eric October 18, 2015

non-offensive swears

"Fetch" for "Fuck"
"Gol" (short for 'Golly') for "God"
"Heck", of course.

Mormons are great sources for psuedo-swears. Check out my site for more fake swearing.
http://www.cafepress.com/shamelesshumor/643594

by Shameless Creations July 23, 2008

Counter-offensive

An insult rendered in passing against someone who is not present, usually over a breakfast counter.

Person 1: Does DImmortal realize that his user-name sounds like "Dim Mortal"?
Person 2: That's counter-offensive, yo.

by MyRealNameIsMyPseudonym December 30, 2009

Skipable Offense

When a fellow pothead intentionally disturbs the peace of the cyph and a vote to skip them on a round on the blunt is initiated

While a blunt is in rotation brandon decides to slap the weed out a rollers hand and someone calls Skipable Offense . Fuck u your getting skipped this round dick

by Nicoboy June 24, 2020