Contractor's Kit

While most people would think that a contractor's kit might consist of a hammer, nails, and maybe a saw to start with, the truth is that these things are of secondary value to most general contractors. The real Contractor's Kit, which can be found in the back of any work van or truck on any jobsite across the country, consists of the three general contracting essentials: a 30 pack of beer, a fifteen ft. length of rope, and a Smith and Wesson with one bullet as a backup. Usually used to describe your displeasure with a certain scenario or certain circumstances.

ex. 1. "Hey Joey you wanna go to that party over that broad's house tonight?"
"Ya sure, but if she talks to me im gonna go out back and string up the Contractor's Kit."

ex. 2. "Hey Matty what you doin this weekend?"
"I dunno not much probly just gonna string up the Kit off the side of the Tobin Bridge after work you wanna come?

by Contractor Craig November 5, 2008

contraception face

Someone so ugly that even the mere sight of their face is a method of birth control. That is, they are so physically unattractive that they will probably never have sex.

"Oh my god, did you see how ugly that guy was?"
"Yeah, what a contraception face!"

or:
"You're so ugly your face is a contraceptive!"

by genjon November 27, 2007

Contrauniversal

Giving or likely giving rise to public disagreements, that affects all people or things in the world.

The discussion on the existence of God was a contrauniversal subject

by Mtee September 4, 2010

multi-contraptional

Any device or technology that is too complicated to successfully operate. A modern version of a Rube Goldberg device.

That widget is so multi-contraptional, it'll never work.

by Wayne Jones September 12, 2005

Concraptions

The short bursts of pain one experiences when they need to take a dump or 'crap'. Similar in length and style to contraptions that a women will experience during labour before birth.

Wife: 'Arghh these contraptions are killing me'

Husband: 'I had Indian food yesterday and the toilet's blocked. My concraptions are way worse'

by Mrcrapper November 2, 2010

Lincoln Way Central

A place in the south suburbs of Chicago that’s full of drugs and is probably older than you. The bathrooms are the most traversed place in the school and they would always smell of mangoes or mint vapor if it wasn’t for the 20 year old piss stained walls. If Lincoln Way Central wasn’t

the first high school building in the district then it would’ve been shut down long ago and Lincoln Way North would be standing proud. It’s a wonder how it not shut down yet due to some health violation

Person 1: Hey do you know what Lincoln Way Central Is?
Person 2: Isn’t a place that’s full of druggies?
Person 1: Yeah, it’s said you can smell Juul pods wherever you are in the school.
Person 2: Wow it sounds like a horrible place.
Person 1: It sounds like a horrible place because it is!

by Last First February 21, 2020

Central Union High School

A high school in El Centro, California, with an enormous band, high school spirit, and low CST scores. Has the longest high school rivalry in the United States with Brawley Union High School called the Bell Game.
Thousands have attended the Bell Game, resulting in fights, overcrowded bleachers, and people sitting on the stairs of the bleachers due to absolutely no seating.
Their mascot is a Spartan. At football games, a chariot with a Spartan would ride out onto the field during the pregame show, but the event stopped when someone got injured. Recently, however, "Sparticus" has come out in full armor riding a horse and waving a sword to get the crowd riled during the pregame show, to the terror of the tall flags and drill team.

Guy 1: "Dude, did you go to the Central Union High School game last night?"

Guy 2: "I only went to see the band. Their performance was bomb."

by akakatie January 5, 2010