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suctorial

1. Highly likely to suck or often does suck.

2. The first word in the acronym SONY
1. a "Ah! Mommy! I turn it on, and I see that the vacuum clearner is suctorial!"
b. "The PlayStation 2 is a poorly designed peice of hardware. For example, The fan blows dust directly into the disc drive. That is one of my logical reasons to say the PS2 is a suctorial machine."
by Can Not March 13, 2005
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Surrogate Boyfriend

1. For a female, a male friend who takes the place of a boyfriend when she is single. Generally speaking, a close male friend who is there emotionally, but is not receiving physical pleasure from the relationship.

2. A close male friend a girl goes to for emotional support when she is single.
Troy - so Dave, Candice came over to your place last night to talk huh?
Dave - yeah.
Troy - you do realize you're her surrogate boyfriend, right?
Dave - dude, no way.
Troy - totally way. She comes over, cries on your shoulder, hangs out, asks your opinion 'bout stuff. And you don't even make out with her? Total surrogate.
Dave - whatever.
Troy - and once she has a boyfriend she'll stop coming to you.

(6 months later)

Troy - see, Candice is now going out with Jason and she's stopped coming to you.
Dave - I was totally whipped.

(elsewhere)

Leslie - Candice, you're so lucky you had Dave while you and Tommy were broken up.
Candice - yeah, he was a good surrogate boyfriend. But I have Jason now so I'm able to go to him, my real boyfriend, when I have problems or wanna hang out.
by ChipGirl August 19, 2008
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Related Words

Surround Sex

Has the same concept as surround sound and basically gives you the effect of actually being there part-taking in actual sex. This requires three (3) or more beds in one room arranged either horizontally or vertically. Surround sex can only be achieved when both roommates in the outer beds are having sex but the one (or more then one) roommate in the middle isn't having sex. Hence the effect of surround sex as he is both surrounded by the sound in at least stereo and the creaking of beds so it gives the impression to the one roommate experiencing this surround sex, that he/she is actually having sex but sadly they are not.

Optional and creepy: The one roommate in the middle not having sex can masturbate to make his surround sex experience more realistic.
Lets say your roommates name is Mike.

"Hey Mike how was that surround sex last night?"

"Oh it was great even though it keep me up all night the surround feeling of Surround Sex made it seem close to real and masturbating only made it better. It was a win win situation for everyone in my opinion."

"Sure. creepy... glad you don't mind though"
by sex machine1447 March 7, 2010
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Jacob sartorius

A stupid person who thinks he is “famous” but actually makes cringe “songs”

(AKA Jacob saggytits)
Ayo you guys heard of Jacob saggytits?

You mean Jacob sartorius, he has good songs right

You are no longer my friend Steve

Bu...

NO
by Jeffboy69 April 29, 2020
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surrogate girl/boyfriend

also called a pseudo-girl/boy friend

a close friend of the opposite sex that you spend a lot of time with and talk to often much the same as you would with a girl/boyfriend, though they never will become your girl/boyfriend due to factors such as, but not limited to: age difference, the other person being in a relationship, the other person living too far away, fear of ruining the friendship etc.

You will often to "date-like" things with them, such as: go to dinner and a movie, take them to a party to introduce them to your friends, or have them meet your parents. though you will never do other "date-like" things, such as: hold hands while walking, get/give a kiss goodnight, have them to a big family function like Christmas dinner etc.

can be a cause of grief and jealousy if one of the friends is in a relationship and their girl/boyfriend feels threatened by the surrogate friend.

NOT to be mistaken for a friend with benefits, there are no sexual conotations on a surrogate friend.
Bob: i feel so bad for Tim, he really likes Sharon but she's been with her boyfriend for 8 months now, so Tim really has no chance

Bill: i know eh, they go to movies almost once a week, and Tim always pays. And they went on that camping trip on the long weekend. If someone didnt know better, they'd think Tim and Sharon were going out

Bob: Tim only wishes that was the case. Poor guy is hung up on her bad. Sharon is like his surrogate girlfriend

*having a surrogate girl/boyfriend sucks
by pb foot May 18, 2010
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Jacob Sartorious

A type of trash that attracts ten year old girls all over the Internet. Jacob wears an acorn or some shit in his pants to look like he has a dick. He is widely known as the 'Fuckboy master'. Other names for him include the following;

Jacob Sclitorous,
Jacob Saggytits,
And Jacob Stegosaurus.
Person 1: "Oh my god dude! 'Hoodie' by a piece of trash is my fav song!"
Person 2: "Wow! A piece of trash produced by a piece of trash!"
Person 3: "Guys don't you mean jacob sartorious??"
by troyelove May 17, 2016
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surrogate

1. One taking the place of another; a temporary successor.

2. Substitute.
1. A surrogate C.E.O. was appointed to the board on an interim basis.

2. A surrogate mother became the answer to the couple's desire for a child.
by James November 18, 2003
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