by Long Shoe Larry March 9, 2008
Get the turd rancher mug.Ok, here goes.
Dude hastily making sandwich. In a hurry for some reason (fill in this part-you're obviously talented).
Gets everything assembled. Bread, lunch meat, lettuce, tomato, cheese. Etc.
Reaches in fridge for mustard. Notices mustard is old and decrepit as fuck. And all crusty around the tip.
Waves hand in "meh" type way.
Notices shiny new bottle of Ranch. Pushes mustard bottle aside and grabs the Hidden Valley like he stole it. Dumps on sandwich.
Big ass bite ensues.
#rancharound.
Boom.
Am I famous yet?
Call me when I'm famous.
Dude hastily making sandwich. In a hurry for some reason (fill in this part-you're obviously talented).
Gets everything assembled. Bread, lunch meat, lettuce, tomato, cheese. Etc.
Reaches in fridge for mustard. Notices mustard is old and decrepit as fuck. And all crusty around the tip.
Waves hand in "meh" type way.
Notices shiny new bottle of Ranch. Pushes mustard bottle aside and grabs the Hidden Valley like he stole it. Dumps on sandwich.
Big ass bite ensues.
#rancharound.
Boom.
Am I famous yet?
Call me when I'm famous.
Boyfriend is watching football, chips in one hand, sammich in the other, gently cradling the bottle of ranch in his "drinkholder" for easy access. Girlfriend wants some healthy shit (celery sticks) and can't find the ranch in the fridge, she sees boyfriend on the couch and knows what's up. She sashays up behind him and kisses on his neck while she reaches around to snag the ranch from his crotch holder. Boom #rancharound
by BaconRainey October 16, 2014
Get the rancharound mug.Related Words
To put ranch on something, in most cases, more ranch than what is considered a normal amount or what is actually needed. The term Rancherise was made by eriktheelectric
by HurricaneHam November 19, 2018
Get the Rancherise mug.Man or woman of ill repute who may have had pubic lice for a long time, to the point of them breeding. Can also be used for similar sexually transmitted diseases.
-"Dude, would you bang Lindsay Lohan without getting paid for it?"
-"No, man, I'd stay away from that crab rancher. She has the Crawford Ranch for crablice inside her jeans."
-"No, man, I'd stay away from that crab rancher. She has the Crawford Ranch for crablice inside her jeans."
by Danny Fehlings November 13, 2007
Get the crab rancher mug.Noun; Someone who makes situations/moments awkward by interjecting into conversations inorder to make someone make an awkward turtle.
Guy: hey did you catch that Celtics game last night?
Guy2: No I...
Guy3: two midgets just stole my ice cream, so i killed them with an ice cream scooper!
Guy2: *makes awkward turtle
Guy: Dude you're a major turtle rancher.
Guy2: No I...
Guy3: two midgets just stole my ice cream, so i killed them with an ice cream scooper!
Guy2: *makes awkward turtle
Guy: Dude you're a major turtle rancher.
by Tucker Sampson May 20, 2008
Get the turtle rancher mug.A fetish game to be played in the dark. A Green Apple Jolly Rancher is when a man eats out a girl with gonorrhea whilst sucking on any flavor jolly rancher, but it just happens that a gonorrhea nodule closely resembles a green apple jolly rancher. He will then proceed to lose the jolly rancher in her pussy and try to fish it out. Unfortunately for the guy, if he grabs the gonorrhea ball and sticks it into his mouth, the infected pus will explode and he will contract several diseases then promptly vomit.
Steve found out too late that Samantha cheated on him because he already ate her green apple jolly rancher.
by epicsexsauce November 4, 2019
Get the Green Apple Jolly Rancher mug.The original female jolly rancher that was created by God that screwed the other original MALE jolly rancher to reproduce.
by JollyRancherMomCreator ~ Bree May 25, 2021
Get the Mother Of Jolly Ranchers mug.