A Guido is an Italian American male who is a complete moron. The Guidos like to screw up the New Jersey shore and disgrace the entier state. They absolutely hate People that are English,Irish,German,Skandanavian, or Slavic.
(which i am English,Irish,German:the Anglosaxon parts of me: and i may be part Skando.)
Guidos often beat up innocent little boys(actual white boys)
Theese Itallians pretend to be white but they are not they are not truly white like me and my friends
Guidos act like black people by listening to rap and burning flags of Anglo-European contries.
unfortuneatly most people like guidos and follow them to death.
The guido virus is high in this world especially because most females of the WHOLE COUNTRY are attracted to them and only them
If you know a paulie or a bernie most likely they spray cologne all over their body and spike their hair and scream the words *muff cabage* out in the air while watching Teresa and Karen and Dainelle fight on the Bravo Channel
The only way to fight the Itallian virus is to burn an Itallian flag raise an Anglosaxon or Skandanavion one and play loud Medolic Death Metal or Heavy Metal
(which i am English,Irish,German:the Anglosaxon parts of me: and i may be part Skando.)
Guidos often beat up innocent little boys(actual white boys)
Theese Itallians pretend to be white but they are not they are not truly white like me and my friends
Guidos act like black people by listening to rap and burning flags of Anglo-European contries.
unfortuneatly most people like guidos and follow them to death.
The guido virus is high in this world especially because most females of the WHOLE COUNTRY are attracted to them and only them
If you know a paulie or a bernie most likely they spray cologne all over their body and spike their hair and scream the words *muff cabage* out in the air while watching Teresa and Karen and Dainelle fight on the Bravo Channel
The only way to fight the Itallian virus is to burn an Itallian flag raise an Anglosaxon or Skandanavion one and play loud Medolic Death Metal or Heavy Metal
Most of the Jersey Shore population
Someone who hates good music and says *muff cabage*
Someone who is burning the flag of Ireland or Germany
is a Guido
Someone who hates good music and says *muff cabage*
Someone who is burning the flag of Ireland or Germany
is a Guido
by Deathmetalfan666 November 18, 2010
A Guido is an Italian American male who is a complete moron. The Guidos like to screw up the New Jersey shore and disgrace the entier state. They absolutely hate People that are English,Irish,German,Skandanavian, or Slavic.
(which i am English,Irish,German:the Anglosaxon parts of me: and i may be part Skando.)
Guidos often beat up innocent little boys(actual white boys)
Theese Itallians pretend to be white but they are not they are not truly white like me and my friends
Guidos act like black people by listening to rap and burning flags of Anglo-European contries.
unfortuneatly most people like guidos and follow them to death.
The guido virus is high in this world especially because most females of the WHOLE COUNTRY are attracted to them and only them
If you know a paulie or a bernie most likely they spray cologne all over their body and spike their hair and scream the words *muff cabage* out in the air while watching Teresa and Karen and Dainelle fight on the Bravo Channel
The only way to fight the Itallian virus is to burn an Itallian flag raise an Anglosaxon or Skandanavion one and play loud Medolic Death Metal or Heavy Metal
(which i am English,Irish,German:the Anglosaxon parts of me: and i may be part Skando.)
Guidos often beat up innocent little boys(actual white boys)
Theese Itallians pretend to be white but they are not they are not truly white like me and my friends
Guidos act like black people by listening to rap and burning flags of Anglo-European contries.
unfortuneatly most people like guidos and follow them to death.
The guido virus is high in this world especially because most females of the WHOLE COUNTRY are attracted to them and only them
If you know a paulie or a bernie most likely they spray cologne all over their body and spike their hair and scream the words *muff cabage* out in the air while watching Teresa and Karen and Dainelle fight on the Bravo Channel
The only way to fight the Itallian virus is to burn an Itallian flag raise an Anglosaxon or Skandanavion one and play loud Medolic Death Metal or Heavy Metal
Most of the Jersey Shore population
Someone who hates good music and says *muff cabage*
Someone who is burning the flag of Ireland or Germany
is a Guido
Someone who hates good music and says *muff cabage*
Someone who is burning the flag of Ireland or Germany
is a Guido
by Deathmetalfan666 November 18, 2010
A type of douche bag.
He usually has a stupid hair cut with an excessive amount of hair product. Also, he sometimes has asymmetrical muscle definition.
Wears bedazzled shirts and irons his underwear.
Some have retarded meaningless tattoos that have no artistic, creative, or meaninful merit.
And 95% of them treat women like shit and exploit them for sexual favors. The other 5% are posers and pussies.
And the real sad Guidos are the 3rd or 4th generation italians that feel as if they're full blown Italian but rather they have no connection with the Italian culture and believe that eating overlooked pasta and yelling exploitive slurs at women validates their Italian heritage.
He usually has a stupid hair cut with an excessive amount of hair product. Also, he sometimes has asymmetrical muscle definition.
Wears bedazzled shirts and irons his underwear.
Some have retarded meaningless tattoos that have no artistic, creative, or meaninful merit.
And 95% of them treat women like shit and exploit them for sexual favors. The other 5% are posers and pussies.
And the real sad Guidos are the 3rd or 4th generation italians that feel as if they're full blown Italian but rather they have no connection with the Italian culture and believe that eating overlooked pasta and yelling exploitive slurs at women validates their Italian heritage.
Carl: Hey look at the douche bag with the retarded hair cut, dedazzled shirt, and meaningless tattoos.
Dave: Stupid Guido
Dave: Stupid Guido
by Sam Hidalgo December 31, 2014
1. Originating from Italian culture. Guidos are those tools you see on Jersey Shore. Not all Italians are Guidos. and in fact there is a difference between the two. And thanks to Jersey Shore there are alot of wannabe Guidos all over the United States. All guidos are total fags and lazy pieces of shit.
2. Proof that whitetrash now comes in orange.
2. Proof that whitetrash now comes in orange.
Fucken hell!!!! eveyone in my school is tryin to be a guido wannabe now, thanks to Jersey Shore!!!!!
by The one with the answer 69 July 8, 2011
GUIDOS and GOOMBAS are both synonymous terms used to describe a certain, very ethnic Italian-American, which usually resides in small New Jersey and New York neighborhoods known as Little Italies. When you take all of the children and grandchildren of Italian immigrants from all the different regions of the boot and throw them together, you have your Little Italy neighborhoods in America, and the GUIDO/GOOMBA subculture emerges. Things get translated and changed and carry on onto the next generation, but the Italian root is still there. The residen ts are special types of Italian-Americans who usually fit a lot of the Hollywood stereotypes, because they are pretty entertaining characters. And this is an east coast subculture that existed long before the movies or TV decided to portray it. It's a special distinction made to certain guys who like Italian things over “meddigan” (white bread waspy) things.
I am proud to say I am one of these characters. We do things to the extreme when it comes to showing off pride for this particular east coast subculture! There’s a special look that separates the GUIDO from a regular American of Italian descent, and from some fool who doesn't have a clue about his heritage. We have certain speech patterns, ways of dress, attitudes and ideas, but we all truly love family, friends, and things that derive from Italy. See, we love to play up all the stereotypes (because most are true). And that love revolves around incorporating something Italian into each day. Whether it's clothes, food, or cars—if it has roots from the boot, it's always better. As long as you have an Italian name and several nicknames, use hand gestures, speak with the GOOMBA slang dialect in that Jersey or Brooklyn accent, and have that unmistakable strut when you walk, you got it a ll as far as I’m concerned.
Look, we don't wanna walk on the moon, we wanna walk to the corner pizza parlor. We don't try to discover a cure for Cancer, we’d rather go down to St. Francis Church and pray for it. We like drinking and just hanging out. The little things in life. I’m a simple guy, and I’ll walk you through my daily routines…
First, I wake up and get ready using my GUIDO hair care and hygiene products (spiking glue, Aqua Net hairspray, Axe body spray). On work days, the outfit is black pants with a big-buckled belt and usually a black shirt, shiny shoes and leather jacket. For breakfast, I usually eat some peppers and eggs and then I stop at the bakery for some espresso. In my sweet Caddie, I pump up my KTU, or pop in a CD of Angelo Venuto, or some freestyle beats.
Once I’m at work, I check the internet news for what's happening on the other side (Italy). When having any conversation with my co-workers, we chat about sports, music, movies or whatever else but we always focus on the Italian-American athletes or singers or actors. Of course, only my fellow paesan co-workers have an equal amount of interest in such things. At lunch time, I go to the Italian deli and pick up a gabagol and mozzarell' sengwich with a cold Manhattan Special. Mmm!
Now getting back to my GUIDO lair is the best part of the day. The first thing I do is to grab an ice cold Peroni out of the fridge and light up a DiNobili cigar. At dinner time, it's homemade macaroni with meatballs and a nice glass of vino. Then I hit the hay with my gal and fall off to sleep until the next day…
When the weekend rolls around, it's out to Club Rise in Lodi to dance and kick back a dozen, and in the summer, it’s always trips down the Jersey shore or to an Italian feast. The Friday and Saturday night attire is usually a designer t-shirt (Armani Exchange, Diesel, Ed Hardy) with jeans, and always my bling (bracelet, nice wristwatch, two pinkie rings, and of course, two necklaces). The Italian horn and religious emblems (Christ on the cross, Holy Mary) are worn on these chains to show off my family heritage and religion. Plus they look cool.
On Sunday afternoons, I get up and throw on a dark colored jogging suit, the prototypical casual outfit. For those that may not be familiar, this attire starts out with a white or black guinea tee and boxer shorts and then the matching jogging suit goes on. They come in cotton or velvet, and all sport the insignia of the company that makes them—Fila is best, obviously, because it is an Italian brand. Puma, Adidas, Nike and Reebok are a few other good ones.
The bottom line is you will know a GUIDO when you see one, at work or at play. We love to party and enjoy life. Even if we aren’t rockstars, we think we are!
I am proud to say I am one of these characters. We do things to the extreme when it comes to showing off pride for this particular east coast subculture! There’s a special look that separates the GUIDO from a regular American of Italian descent, and from some fool who doesn't have a clue about his heritage. We have certain speech patterns, ways of dress, attitudes and ideas, but we all truly love family, friends, and things that derive from Italy. See, we love to play up all the stereotypes (because most are true). And that love revolves around incorporating something Italian into each day. Whether it's clothes, food, or cars—if it has roots from the boot, it's always better. As long as you have an Italian name and several nicknames, use hand gestures, speak with the GOOMBA slang dialect in that Jersey or Brooklyn accent, and have that unmistakable strut when you walk, you got it a ll as far as I’m concerned.
Look, we don't wanna walk on the moon, we wanna walk to the corner pizza parlor. We don't try to discover a cure for Cancer, we’d rather go down to St. Francis Church and pray for it. We like drinking and just hanging out. The little things in life. I’m a simple guy, and I’ll walk you through my daily routines…
First, I wake up and get ready using my GUIDO hair care and hygiene products (spiking glue, Aqua Net hairspray, Axe body spray). On work days, the outfit is black pants with a big-buckled belt and usually a black shirt, shiny shoes and leather jacket. For breakfast, I usually eat some peppers and eggs and then I stop at the bakery for some espresso. In my sweet Caddie, I pump up my KTU, or pop in a CD of Angelo Venuto, or some freestyle beats.
Once I’m at work, I check the internet news for what's happening on the other side (Italy). When having any conversation with my co-workers, we chat about sports, music, movies or whatever else but we always focus on the Italian-American athletes or singers or actors. Of course, only my fellow paesan co-workers have an equal amount of interest in such things. At lunch time, I go to the Italian deli and pick up a gabagol and mozzarell' sengwich with a cold Manhattan Special. Mmm!
Now getting back to my GUIDO lair is the best part of the day. The first thing I do is to grab an ice cold Peroni out of the fridge and light up a DiNobili cigar. At dinner time, it's homemade macaroni with meatballs and a nice glass of vino. Then I hit the hay with my gal and fall off to sleep until the next day…
When the weekend rolls around, it's out to Club Rise in Lodi to dance and kick back a dozen, and in the summer, it’s always trips down the Jersey shore or to an Italian feast. The Friday and Saturday night attire is usually a designer t-shirt (Armani Exchange, Diesel, Ed Hardy) with jeans, and always my bling (bracelet, nice wristwatch, two pinkie rings, and of course, two necklaces). The Italian horn and religious emblems (Christ on the cross, Holy Mary) are worn on these chains to show off my family heritage and religion. Plus they look cool.
On Sunday afternoons, I get up and throw on a dark colored jogging suit, the prototypical casual outfit. For those that may not be familiar, this attire starts out with a white or black guinea tee and boxer shorts and then the matching jogging suit goes on. They come in cotton or velvet, and all sport the insignia of the company that makes them—Fila is best, obviously, because it is an Italian brand. Puma, Adidas, Nike and Reebok are a few other good ones.
The bottom line is you will know a GUIDO when you see one, at work or at play. We love to party and enjoy life. Even if we aren’t rockstars, we think we are!
by Johnny DeCarlo February 21, 2009
Clothing- A|X tee shirts, diesel shirts, wife beaters, sweat jackets usually by puma or adidas part of a matching set with pants, A|X jeans, ben sherman jeans , sweat pants, And capris. anything tight that shows off muscle definition.diesel shoes, nike cortezs, pumas. and let us not forget the classic A|X belt equipped with the nextel. lots of gold or silver chains some with italian horns. and kangol hats and sunglasses worn all day and all night.
Whips- BMW'S usally convertable, Cadillac's, or anything expensive that will make someone say damn! and has a banging system and an italian flag in one or more places..
place of birth- could be anywhere but most guidos reside in northern and southern jerzee and parts of new york predominately brooklyn bensonhurst section.
hang outs- joey's in clifton (if youre from jerzee you know the place), spirit, exit, abyss, temptations, djais, bamboo, any club in the area or the gym mostly gold's gym where you can purchase steroids (not all guidos do steroids though).
music- techno, house, dance, very little rap if any at all. music that u can all form a circle around eachother and dance using the guido fist pump to songs like "pump it up"-danzel, " dancin, i got the pills"-oscar g
phones- usally nextel with a cover and loud ringers and constantly showing no matter what they are wearing.Usually always talking on it.
hair-takes longer to do then all your sisters combined, if you have no sisters then to put it blunt a long fucking time. cut into something called a brook, or brooklyn which consists of long spikes on top and sides but sideburns shaved to points and the back is squared off.
Other Guido Characteristics- tans all week, lifts weights and gets hair cut every week and eyebrows waxxed every week.
Guidos are commonly mistaken as stuck up pretty boys who use way to much gel. They're actually hot! Some are jackasses because they ALL know they look good, but some are chill.
Italian females with the same characteristics are known as Guidettes, like me.
Whips- BMW'S usally convertable, Cadillac's, or anything expensive that will make someone say damn! and has a banging system and an italian flag in one or more places..
place of birth- could be anywhere but most guidos reside in northern and southern jerzee and parts of new york predominately brooklyn bensonhurst section.
hang outs- joey's in clifton (if youre from jerzee you know the place), spirit, exit, abyss, temptations, djais, bamboo, any club in the area or the gym mostly gold's gym where you can purchase steroids (not all guidos do steroids though).
music- techno, house, dance, very little rap if any at all. music that u can all form a circle around eachother and dance using the guido fist pump to songs like "pump it up"-danzel, " dancin, i got the pills"-oscar g
phones- usally nextel with a cover and loud ringers and constantly showing no matter what they are wearing.Usually always talking on it.
hair-takes longer to do then all your sisters combined, if you have no sisters then to put it blunt a long fucking time. cut into something called a brook, or brooklyn which consists of long spikes on top and sides but sideburns shaved to points and the back is squared off.
Other Guido Characteristics- tans all week, lifts weights and gets hair cut every week and eyebrows waxxed every week.
Guidos are commonly mistaken as stuck up pretty boys who use way to much gel. They're actually hot! Some are jackasses because they ALL know they look good, but some are chill.
Italian females with the same characteristics are known as Guidettes, like me.
Go to Staten Island and you'll see all the Guidos you need. Guido Central is a great place to meet some Guidos too.
Look at that Guido. I love his tan!
My brother uses way more hair gel than me! What a Guido!
Leave the Cheap Stallion and jump on a Guido Italian!
Look at that Guido. I love his tan!
My brother uses way more hair gel than me! What a Guido!
Leave the Cheap Stallion and jump on a Guido Italian!
by Italian Guidette October 29, 2006
A distinct individual. A Guido is mysterious and he always keeps you wanting to know more about him. He has this killer smile that can make you melt, and they may be shy at first but once you get to know a Guido you find yourself becoming really interested in one. They have this unique sense of humor and Guidos always have you smiling even when you're not with one. They're very strong willed and talented. They're usually tall and have really nice shoulders. Guidos have a strong sexth appeal, and theres just something unique about a Guido that keeps you really drawn to him. Guidos are too modest about themselves and don't tend to realize how great they really are and that can get irritating sometimes.. Make sure to always be there for your Guido, and if you find a Guido you're pretty lucky because they're rly hard to find..
by askdhsuw July 18, 2014