Skip to main content

Contortionist

Someone who sleeps at an awkward fashion in bed or couch. They bend their neck and upper back greater than 90 degrees. These people do not often use their pillows.
My love. Last night you slept like a contortionist. I took a photo as proof.
by Gigifernandez February 20, 2018
mugGet the Contortionist mug.

contortionist

someone who contorts their body.
like very far backbends and other examples of flexibility.
by juunan September 3, 2005
mugGet the contortionist mug.

contortionist

the ultimate sex toy. I don't, however, know if two contortionist's could go at it, because they would probably orgasm before starting just because of the fantasy's.
Contortionist + Contortionist = Crazy monkey sex
by VA Boy August 12, 2004
mugGet the contortionist mug.

Contours

Contours refers to when you climb out of a swimming pool and your shorts cling to your crotch area giving a very accurate 3 dimensional impression of what your meat and 2 veg look like. Particularly embarrassing in large pools with lots of people. Can be avoided, but takes practise. Contours cannot be achieved in speedos for obvious reasons.
Bob: Hahaha look at Mike's contours! No wonder he's so shy!
Mike: Hey! That pool is cold!

Girl: SORT YOUR CONTOURS YOU PERV!
by Daveypants September 29, 2005
mugGet the Contours mug.

The Contortionist

much like doggy-style, except halfway through, the man shits into a sock and proceeds to beat the woman with the shit filled sock until orgasm is reached
"Honey! I got new socks...looks like its time for the contortionist!"
"Ok honey, maybe not in the face this time?"
by honeybadger1 August 24, 2011
mugGet the The Contortionist mug.

cuntour

(noun)
1. Derived from the words "cunt" and "whore," it is used to express that much more disgust with a female than it's roots.

2. A female of ill repute to say the least; worse than a prostitute because she does it for free - hence she has nothing to show for it aside from the nut on her face.
Dude, the whole crew has boned her, she's a filthy cuntour!

Kiss you? Kiss a skeezy cuntour like you? You gotta be fucking kidding me!
by The Bald Head Assassin August 5, 2006
mugGet the cuntour mug.

contorquelate

to have hatered for a person beyond and above comprehension of the human mind.
I just contorquelate that fucking bitch!
by Andrew P. Roque February 25, 2004
mugGet the contorquelate mug.

Share this definition

Sign in to vote

We'll email you a link to sign in instantly.

Or

Check your email

We sent a link to

Open your email