Swedish stretch

When someone pulls their dick almost to the breaking point on a regular basis in order to increase the length over time

Danny told me he tried to give himself the Swedish stretch over the weekend and ended up in the ER…

by catmommy42069 November 27, 2022

The 'Ol Stretcheroo

When you pull your pants down and stretch out your flaccid cock in front of a friend. Pulls should be done with no more than three fingers and start only at the head of the cock so that your friend can pellucidly see your pencil-thin shlong stretched out across the room. Optionally, as a variation, you may lean slightly back, bending your knees and yell "YEAHH" while nodding your head up and down .

Joe mistook Jamal's shlong for a piece of black licorice when Jamal was having his time with the 'Ol Stretcheroo. This explains a lot about Jamal but I still don't know where my bike is.

by _________________________-____ October 2, 2012

end up in a stretcher

when you get beat the fuck up

did you see that nigga end up in a stretcher

by notarealnigga December 20, 2018

HOWE did he make stitches so fast???

He used his newly-invented sewing machine (duh!).

In a historic mid-1800's sewing-speed contest, Elias Howe was able to sew 250 stitches per minute on his mechanical wonder, as opposed to a mere thirty stitches that a group of professional seamstresses were able to make in that same allotment of time. I imagine that said fleet-fingered ladies exchanged astonished gawking stares and asked each other, "HOWE did he make stitches so fast???"

by QuacksO April 5, 2019

National Ball Stretcher Day

National Ball Stretcher Day is on March 14th, Carl Wheezer's birthday. Use your ball stretcher too your full extent. All Day and All Night.

Person 1:Hey, today is national ball stretcher day. Have you used your ball stretcher yet today?
Person 2:Why wouldn't I have?

by Mitlander May 9, 2020

Grandfather Stitch

The extra stitch added to episiotomy (taint) sutures to make the vagina just a little bit tighter after child birth.

“You need to ask the doctor to give her a grandfather stitch to return that cooch to factory-new condition.”

by steve-o-reno September 5, 2010

tighter that a mosquito's ass stretched over a rain barrel

Used to describe the tightness of a womans vagina to all your friends. Often used in conjuction with the words likepussy, cunt, and box. BEWARE! NEVER USE IN FRONT OF WOMEN TO DESCRIBE OTHER WOMEN. DIRE CONSEQUENCES MAY INCUR!

Her cunt was tighter that a mosquito's ass stretched over a rain barrel... niccce!

by Jeep_Junkie March 13, 2007