Schaumberg

The coolest motherfucker I know to date, he parties after he teaches at strip clubs, he knows every inch of their body "after all he slays as much poon as a horny panther" after taking hardcore drugs as Meth and Cocaine, He dominates his wife with his 12in dick. Overall the "sex-God" of the century.

Boy: after class I want to be a Schaumberg

by dj rabbit April 14, 2014

schlemmer

A man with low standards, who, in focusing on convenience over quality, will take whatever he can get.

"After finding out her boyfriend was a schlemmer, Chelsea demanded he get tested for VD."

by Ed, A General, A Renegade May 13, 2005

Schmuck Schumer

What senator Chuck Schumer is.

Chuck Schumer thinks the government should pass out stimulus checks to immigrants during inflation. More like Schmuck Schumer.

by Skyrim550 June 9, 2022

Schumer

A female who is not obviously very attractive at first or not your usual type, but you still find yourself sexually attracted to her. Originates from the female comedian Amy Schumer.

Craig - I'm not sure what it is about her, but I really want to fuck that bird over there !

Mark - Didn't think you went for blondes ?

Craig - I know, but look bruv, she's a proper Schumer !

by VapourPhase December 20, 2015

Schumer Paradox

A paradox (one (such as a person, situation, or action) having seemingly contradictory qualities or phases) in which said person (Amy Schumer, that one girl named carly etc.) misinterprets charming personality traits, making unfunny jokes and saying weird hurtful things, assuming that all failures are a result of "not doing it good enough;" perpetuating an eternal cycle of false feedback.

P1 "You know that one chick in english who tries waaay too hard?" P2 "Oh yeah homies stuck in a Schumer Paradox

by Wodentheallfather April 9, 2022

schlemmer

a man who takes advantage of very young, innocent women for his own sexual pleasure and cynical intellectual delight

She was in her early twenties, but very pure, having had only one boyfriend since she was seventeen. Not only a worldly man, but quite the schlemmer, he used his experience to take complete physical advantage of her...not to mention the emotional abuse he dealt.

by RBWC November 17, 2003

Schlumped

The state of being so high and/or miserable you’re just mentally tired.

Damn bro I just got dumped and I’m hella schlumped.

by Asshole.1234 May 24, 2018