goldfish

Someone with an extremely short memory, or one who is extremely absentminded.

Derives from the evolutionary defense mechanism of the American Goldfish in order to stave off insanity due to boredom: "wow look at that pretty plastic tree"... "wow look at that pretty plastic tree"... "wow look at that pretty plastic tree"
"Damn...That Sue never learns... She just does the same dumb shit over and over again like a goldfish."
by SueLowe October 10, 2005
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goldfish

1. A popular pet often kept in bowls (which they shouldn't, that's bad for them) and often thought of as having a 3 second memory, though this is a myth, because in reality goldfish have a longer memory than you do.

2. The snack that smiles back.

3. People that have a super short memory, originating from the myth that goldfish have a 3 second memory (which they don't)
1:

SMART son:"Mom, I found a goldfish!"
Mom: "Ok, keep it in your bowl"
SMART son: "FUCK YOU YOU DON'T KNOW SHIT ABOUT TAKING CARE OF GOLDFISH"

2:

"I had some goldfish yesterday. I wonder why it was smiling at me even though it was gonna die and get digested and turn into shit."

3:

SMART daughter: "Dad, look at that goldfish!"
Dad: "Oh, that's a person, not a goldfish!"
SMART daughter: "DUMBASS I WAS THINKING OF THE PERSON "
by Corey the best Definer July 20, 2016
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goldfish

A pet that doesn't do anything.
My goldfish was named Snappy.
by Angelacia March 08, 2008
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goldfish

Fish-shaped crackers that are baked, not fried.
Dat bitch's gonna pop yo punk ass because yo ate dems GoldFish, yo .
by ALLAH January 13, 2004
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Goldfished

Similar to being “catfished,” a person gets “goldfished” when...the person they’ve been talking to via “online” etc is, indeed, the right person, they just promised everything in the world, gold, glitter and diamonds, and after meeting....they brought nothing but empty promises.
“We been chattin’ online these last 8 months, he promised me that he’d treat me like a queen. Now that we’ve met, he been nothin’ but jealous and controlling.”

“Girl, you done been goldfished.”
by Maver7ck April 24, 2020
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goldfished it

yeah I soooo don't want to do that anyway!
So I goldfished it!
by mega3dfx May 11, 2005
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