Computer Engineer

A college major that will make you hate your life, your friends, computers, electronics, and anything remotely enjoyable about your life. Mass consumption of alcohol in the 20 minutes of free time a week keeps you sane.

"Yo look at dude banging his head off the wall"
"Must be a computer engineer"

by LateNightEngineer April 14, 2010

computer engineering

The best kind of engineering. Every job wants you, everybody needs you. Software? You shit out programs for breakfast. All other engineers look up to you because you're a beast. You blend into any group of friends because you own geeky conversations, but you still stay in shape like a salsa dancing gazelle. You dress to impress and the bitches can't get off you because you got dat layer of abs underneath that button down shirt.

"I heard Jakey B switch to computer engineering"
"Damn, God made another angel today"

by anonymous124124 January 6, 2014

apple computer

thread on urbandictionary.com used by geeks to insult each other

apples are shit blah blah...
no theyre not blah blah...

by oracle March 12, 2004

computurd

That one type of crappy computer that is found in every school, business, and old folks' home. It's covered in dust and grime, the CD drive doesn't work, and its running Windows 95 and AOL 4.0. When people say "fix my computer", they're talking about their computurd. Its not even worth looking at.

That college's computer lab stinks. All they've got is computurds that can't even run Solitaire!

by Rossmo December 7, 2004

School computer

The term “school computer” means that a select computer takes 15 minutes to boot up and an additional 5 to load in your first search and cannot even run flash games above 45fps, usually 5-15 years old.

Kid: Dude this thing is like a school computer!
Kid2: And you just bought it?
Kid: Hell yea, and I’m pissed!

by Boing Doinkus December 20, 2018

School Computer

A piece of crap that is somehow slower than my 1$ calculator.

Outdated hardware like a intel processor from the 1990s and only 512mb of ram. It cant even run notepad without blue screening. (I once fried these computers by switching the PSU switch from 240V to 120V and boom it went, smoke was coming from it.

Person 1: Oi mate don't you just love these crappy school computers
Person 2: Yeah lol there just absolute shit
Person 1: I blew one of these up in primary school but anyway wanna have some VB's and do skidz in the commodore.
Person 2: FUCK YEAAAAA

by Some random ozzy May 9, 2022

Compture

The word you use when you failed to spell computer

Person: "wy my compture brok"
Tech support: "What do you mean?"

by eggman nega December 16, 2020