jehovah's witness repellent

Step 1: Say you worship the devil or are the devil.

Step 2: Those cowards will run away screaming.

*Jehovah's Witness knocks on man's door*
Witness: Hello, sir, do you have time to talk about his Holy Grace Lord and Saviour Jesus?
Michael: GET OUT OF HERE OR I WILL CURSE YOU FOR I am SATAN! *starts flailing and rolling on the floor*
* Witness runs away*
Jehovah's Witness repellent
See? Easy.

by EasternEuropeanSlavLover January 27, 2022

paris hilton without makeup

Paris Hilton without Makeup is the grossest thing ever.

Did you see that picture of Paris Hilton without Makeup? I almost threw up.

by Kschenke July 29, 2008

Jehovah's Witnesses

Let me first say I am a Jehovah's Witness so what I am going to say is what we actaully believe in.

Jehovah is the name of God and we are His witnesses to carry on His word through the Bible.

We do not believe in the Trinity, Jehovah is God and Jesus is His son.

We believe blood transfusions are wrong and this is because in the Bible it says not to use the blood of others (or at least in that similiar sense)

We are NOT a cult if we get money it is from members of the Kingdom Hall we don't just knock on your door and say Hey can we have your money.

We come to your door because we want everyone to have knowledge of Jehovah (and when we come to your door we show respect and it would be nice to get it in return)
We don't celebrate the holidays because they are considered pagen so we do not particpate.

We follow the Bible it points us in the right direction and gives us faith and allows us to gain knowledge of Jehovah and His son Jesus.

We also believe that once you die you are cleared of your sins and you can live in paradise but if you try to go back to sinful ways you will be gone.

We believe there is not a Hell where you burn for eternity because of a life of wrong-doing and everyone does not go to Heaven only the chosen few, when you die the dead are unconcious of everything but you will be awaken by Jesus to live in the world of paradise.


I might not be right about every aspect but this is what I have learned through my father and I am only 16 so I have time to correct myself. I just wanted to do this because so many have a wrong impression of the people who are the same religion as me, and I wanted to give them correct information.

Jehovah's Witnesses are like normal people and just try to spread knowledge so everyone has the same oppurtunity.

by Melly :-) December 23, 2008

jehovah's witnesses

Ok well, first of all, Jehovah's Witnesses are NOT a cult. They have their own beliefs just like any other religion. Yes, Witnesses don't believe in the trinity. But why is it that Buddhists (just an example)or any other religion that doesn't believe in God is not criticised?? They all have their own belifs. And for everyone who is saying things, have you actually ever talked to a Witness in person?? Don'y believe everything you hear. Also, it is true that Witnesses do change their teachings at times. But the reason is because they have discovered something new in the bible and have revised their teachings in order continue living according to bible principles and laws. The celebrating of Christmas, birthdays, etc are not bible teachings. Does anyone recall Jesus and his disciples ever doing any of these things?? Honestly, just contact the Witnesses yourself.

As one of Jehovah's Witnesses, you may face opposition, but did not Jesus face such things also?

by azncutie November 9, 2006

Jehovah's Witnesses

I see there is someone stating that the Jehovah Witnesses don't accept blood transfusions and that nowhere in the bible does it say anything about blood. Well I strongly disagree, I can tell you it is very clear Act 15:20 KJV "But what we write unto them, that they abstain from pollutions of idols, and from fornication and from things strangled(or killed without draining their blood) and from Blood."
Most people think a child died because the parents are Jehovah witnesses and they don't accept blood but didn't you think maybe the child died from complications and because they don't accept transfusions the child died from a complication.
Also look in to acts 2 15:28-29. "Jehovah Witness actually receive better medical treatment because they don't accept blood" (American Journal of Obstetrics and gynecology 1968).
All surguries including open heart surgery, brain surgury you name it. The army is actually now using the methods Witnesses have been using for years because there blood supply is down.

I'm so glad people don't know what they are talking about that they convince themselves that they know everything. Don't claim to know what the bible says or doesn't say if you have never read it. I will always quote from the King James Version, which is what is normally used in most christain churches. I am not a Jehovah Witness but I have studied with them and they are wonderful people and they don't just make up crazy things from no where their beliefs come staight from the bible. While everyone who is not a witness is reading this consider one thing where in the bible does it tell you that you are going to heaven if you are good? Good luck (just a hint it isn't in there I've studied the entire bible)

by j2k January 1, 2005

wino pudding

Vomit usually from drinking to much.

I drank way too much and blew wino pudding all over my car.

by Lander Drewson November 13, 2003

School Without Balls

A real-life version of the most disgusting hentai ever made.

School is Hell!

by Anarchist October 20, 2003