marker wipe

When you wipe, wipe, and wipe a hundred times, but theres still poop. Its like you’re wiping a marker.

Sorry I’m late, I had the marker wipes!

by Qslammer November 15, 2017

Shweat Wipe

The act of wiping ones inexplicably shitty arse without having actually passed a stool.

"Man, you would not have believed that was just a shweat wipe, I saw sweetcorn!"

by The Last Lizard King July 5, 2016

poke wipe

When you get done eating sauerkraut all day, after New Years and your asshole is so raw it hurts to wipe normal so you have to poke your butthole with toilet paper just so it doesn’t continue to hurt any worse and cause mass-bleeding from hemorrhoids.

Goddam I ate so much sauerkraut I had to poke wipe my chili ring all day it hurt so bad.

by Bretandalexiswillgetmarried January 17, 2018

wipe a mole

The act of wiping a stool that stays lodged in your ass, hiding there like a mole in a hole.

Too many chicken chili cheese fries last night, had to wipe a mole all morning long.

by Luvsyoumor January 17, 2018

Double Wipe

It's when you're conserving the use of your toilet paper and helping the environment, when wiping your ass:

- Using a moderate amount of toilet paper folded into your hand, you make your first wipe within your ass in one vigorous swoop

- The handful of thin fabric paper in your hand now is strongly stained brown, in a streaky motion with chunks, with a strong but familiar smell

- You then flip over said layers of paper onto it's clean white side, while holding onto it by the edges, to minimize the fecal residue that is to stick to your fingers

- Then in a 2nd strong motion, you wipe your ass with this new clean side, collecting even more manure lodged between the depths of your ass cheeks

- You are then to drop said folds of toilet paper -- now doubly stained by strong, chunky fecal streaks, into the toilet

- Unravel another string of toilet paper, and repeat the process another 3-4 times, to ensure your anal region is fecal free, while being kind to the environment.

"Dude, we're running out of toilet paper kinda quick. Don't tell me you're only single-wiping! That is sooo 2015. We Double Wipe around here, like every good citizen."

by Big girl panties April 20, 2020

snag wipe

one that wipes snot or boogers upon a door knob or wall

Raphael put snag wipe on girlfriends hair

by drippydick11 January 8, 2012

wipe licker

someone so low, they lick the wipes used to wipe someones butt.
the rung below arse licker on the social ladder.

"Hey guess what Tom did last night!"
"what?"
"got with Harry's girlfriend!"
"That dude is such a wipe licker"

by salaamhabibti October 27, 2011