Almost Blowjob

When you're sure that you're about to get a blowjob, but then events out of your control cockblock you.

"Dawg, i almost got a blowjob last night"
"What?"
"Yeah, this girl was for sure going to give me a blowjob, but then her boyfriend called her. He was waiting outside to pick her up. I got an almost blowjob."

by TimBayBe December 13, 2009

You almost thirty!

Meaning you know better than that. You are too old to be doing something stupid.

Her: I like to wear pigtails and barrettes in my hair.
Him: You almost thirty! Come on now!

by Bell07 February 3, 2008

alfonso

a terrible, annoying person that has no heart and no feelings. don’t trust him what so ever.

this alfonso guy is so rude

by sidneey April 27, 2019

almond joy

A situation in which a man's testicles might shift to a position that is very uncomfortable and requires adjusting.

Rick totally forgot how deep my car seats were the other day and gave himself an almond joy.

by destructoid user February 25, 2008

Alfons

He is hella gay lmao

Alfons = gay lul

by The guy who is hella gamer April 20, 2020

I'm almost there

I'm almost there is what a guy tells his jack-off squire when he almost reaches the point of no return while being jacked off.

Matt always says "I'm almost there" when he's about to blow his load when I'm jacking him off!

by USAF Cadet July 30, 2021

Alfonso

He is a tall, dark skinned chad who's so buff that his dick has a six pack on it. He is aware of what type of effect he puts unto girls. With his responsibility and humility, he stays single to save women

Women: what are your preferences in girls?
Alfonso: men

by Bababoeymenlover November 17, 2021