Volvo-driving soccer moms

A porn star (a real wild child) who retires and becomes a blonde, bland, republican wife.

Where do all the porn stars go
When the lights go down?
I think I know where all the porn stars go
They all become Volvo-driving soccer moms

by Anna Norwood February 24, 2008

soccer

... is to sport like riverdance is to the performing arts. Yes, it does take some skill, they don't use their arms AND it is incredibly boring.

Also known for

- players taking melodramatic dives to get a penalty
- curing insomnea
- having only 3 real rules, one of which no-one can actually explain (off side)
- fans who start riots

Thank God for William Webb Ellis, the first soccer player to realise how stupid the game was and picked up the ball.

If you want to keep a ball in the air for 10 minutes, buy a hackeysack. That's as relevant to playing soccer as spinning a basketball on one finger is to playing basketball.

It's not all bad. After all, without soccer, there'd be no "soccer mums" and you know you like them !

I went to a soccer game the other day and fell asleep instantly. At full time my friend woke me. I asked if I had missed anything and he said "nil all draw - but the grass grew a bit".

Next time I'll go to something entertaining, like Netball, Rugby League, Hockey (ice or field), Lingerie League etc.

by E_Z_Fleece November 14, 2011

Soccer Player

A soccer player is a boy/girl that is awesome. They work really hard and get hurt constantly. They are strong and players of the best sport, unlike football players.

Wow that person is super fast, they must be a soccer player. ⚽️

by Hehe👞👞 December 8, 2019

Soccer

Its called football, dumbass

USA: Let's play soccer
Rest of the world: STFU ITS FOOTBALL

by LOL696969969696 April 3, 2014

Soccer kids

Weird kids that brag about how tired they are

Soccer kids: I’m sooo tired from my game

Normal kids: SHUT THE HELL UP NOBODY CARES

by Jayjay1254 May 11, 2019

racquetball soccer

A glorious sport, practiced in a racquetball court. A soccer ball takes the place of a racquetball, and two teams try to get the ball to the forward wall without letting the ball bounce on the ground more than twice. If the ball hits any wall/the ground other than the forward wall during the serve, the serve is a fault and must be done over. Play goes to an odd number decided upon at the start, as required by time available to play. 5, 7, 11, 15, and 21 are common goal scores. Not to be confused with SocCourt.

Hey! I've got a free period! Let's go play some Racquetball Soccer!

by The Gumrunner September 28, 2007

girl soccer

The best most important game played by the the dominant sex.

Wow look at that girl soccer game they are awesome

by Rye March 11, 2015