I have a cat in my lap

The last excuse for not doing something without admitting to laziness. Often used by cat owners and drunks/meth whores

Mom: Timothy, take out the trash!
Tim: I will.
Mom: No, NOW!
Tim: I'm busy.
Mom: BULLSHIT!
Tim: But, I have a cat in my lap!

Bill: Ted, can you hand me a beer.
Ted: Go gret it yershelf....
Bill: Dude, it's right there.
Ted: .....MraI have a crat in m'lap.....
Bill: There's nothing there...where are your pants? ...You have shit on your dick.

by imthatawesome September 14, 2012

puke in my lap and you get a smack in the face

If somebody decides to vomit on my jeans or shirt (shoes I am not too worried about) Then a short sharp smack in their face will ensue!

*bleuurrghh* *splatter* *dribble* *frown* *tense* *smack!* "ow, that hurt you fucking cunt!" *smack* "ok, I'll shut up!"

by Valoch.D.M November 9, 2004

1 lap

Lap = 1000

1 lap= 1000 kr
100 lapper = 100.000kr

Bare give mig 1 lap

by Akrash April 6, 2016

run a lap miller

someone that makes you run laps.

run a lap miller made me run 700 laps.

by fuck boston October 7, 2007

vic lap

the abbriviation of the phrase "Victory Lap"

- could mean to go for another lap after winning a race in celebration of winning

- to finnish something and go back through the experience for the hell of it...or because you need to...

"Hey, Minni, are you going back to school for a vic lap?"
"Why yes! I need to upgrade some of my marks."

by cherrycola March 31, 2008

Victory Lap

When you have sex with a former partner(s) you used to date, or be thing with, but this time was with no commitment

Harry: Yo what you do over the weekend?
Collin: I went back to my hometown and had a Victory Lap with my Ex-girlfriend and two others.

by Viktor Valentine March 18, 2017

National Lap sitting day

National lap sitting day is when you sit on someone’s lap just to tease or flirt with them which is on October 30th

Girl- sits on dude’s lap
Guy- “what the hell?”
Girl- “it’s national lap sitting day”

by MyM3mesAreD34D October 18, 2019