jared schmeck

“Jared Schmeck" is the yellow discharge from the top of a penis infected with an STD.

I fucked this skank at a DMB concert and now I have this smelly Jared Schmeck on my dick.

by EverybodyPanic December 27, 2021

Jared Moskowitz

Jared is a 7 foot tall Jewish man who knows 22 languages…including mandarin. He weighs 300 pounds of pure muscle and can be a bit of a herb. Has 12 fingers but knows how to use them and will whisper things in your ear that you just have to laugh off cause you can’t hear him…This is Jared

“Jared Moskowitz is bodybuilding herb”

by Lovelove3412 February 14, 2023

Jared Thomas

Somebody who doesn't answer your messages. When or if they respond, there messages are about weed or anything that contains THC.

P1: dude answer my messages
P2: no response

P1: Your such a Jared Thomas!

by Omgimaduck August 28, 2014

Jared Gavin

A total dick

Over reacts

and is always wrong but doesnt admit it.

Jared gavin over reacted to a pillow fight.

by pr4 dude November 6, 2013

Jared’s Pose

The peace sign over the individuals face/head area

Did you see that dweeb doing the Jared’s pose? What a loser

by Fat Mano March 31, 2020

jared kleinman

from the musical dear evan hansen, jared kleinman is the BEST BOY. a sarcastic and sometimes mean asshole but he’s insecure and uses meanness as a defense mechanism. jared is a loyal friend but will sometimes call you an acorn for falling out of a tree and breaking your arm.

“jared kleinman is a bit rude, but i feel like we could be good friends!

by luhduhquhwin October 17, 2021

hot Jared

When you Saran Wrap your ball sack to your neighbor’s nostrils then hop on your riding lawn mower and drive into town.

I had to hot Jared my coworker because he didn’t do his TCP reports.

by Frumpee September 3, 2022