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Captain of the Carpet Ship

A title bestowed upon one who is drunk and passed out on the floor, like they are piloting the carpet.
Shit, man! You were Captain of the Carpet Ship last night.
by Dr. Badwrench September 22, 2006
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carpe snooze'em

To seize the snooze.

The opposite of carpe diem which is Latin for "seize the day." This means to go back to sleep.
When waking up early in the morning, a person must decide whether to carpe diem or carpe snooze'em. Usually a internal (sometimes external) debate of the mind occurs, "Carpe diem....carpe snooze'em....carpe diem....carpe snooze'em. Carpe snooze'em." Sadly, the latter usually wins out if the debate ever occurs.
by TheNcredibleEgg November 7, 2008
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Related Words

Skin Cape

When the back, specifically the lats, are worked out so hard that they, overtime, turn into solid steel. It is as if the man with the ripped back is wearing a cape, hence the term 'skin cape'.
'Dude, what is that on your back?', said the skinny man to the ripped fella on the lat-pulldown machine. 'Its my skin cape, its real, and its bulletproof.'
by jonnyclan January 26, 2006
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carpet sweeping

Manually, with the digits of the hand, or orally pleasuring a woman who is totally hairy down in the nether regions.
Sorry I missed your call, I was carpet sweeping my girl's rug.
by BigM_MysteryMann September 9, 2011
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Carpet Pisser

A person (Chinaman or not) who pisses on a rug which may or may not "tie the room together", thus rendering the rug useless.
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It's a shame that the Chinaman pissed on your rug, Dude... It really tied the room together.

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BRANDT: He suspects that the culprits might be the very people who, uh, soiled your rug, and you're in a unique position to confirm or, uh, disconfirm that suspicion.

DUDE: So he thinks it's the carpet-pissers, huh?

BRANDT: Well Dude, we just don't know.

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by UrbanAchiever March 2, 2005
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call someone on the carpet

To call someone into question; to question one's action
by stanzz October 25, 2006
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carpet bomb

Texting every girl in your phonebook in a feeble attempt to get laid.
After he got belligerent, Stephan proceeded to carpet bomb until Ursula texted him back and something was set up.
by Andy & Colt May 6, 2008
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