Similar to the speed test used to test your internet connection, but this speed test is used to determine which checkout line is moving faster. It involves a snap judgment as to (1) which checkout clerk looks the least likely to encounter a situation in which they have to call the manager, and (2) which customers are least likely to have some sort of problem at checkout.
I used the speed test at Costco and got burned when the line I changed into was actually slower than the line I moved out of.
by Ae5Ea8 April 5, 2015
Get the speed test mug.by DarkScienceGirl July 12, 2015
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When you masturbate as quick as possible by stroking your hand furiously and watching the porno two times the speed. You should be able to finish within 30 seconds.
by NotoriousGWN July 17, 2016
Get the speed rub mug.by loomis130 December 18, 2016
Get the sneefle mug.Driver: hey lets follow the guy who just passed us
Passenger: Nah, he'll think you're a chicken shit speed burglar
Passenger: Nah, he'll think you're a chicken shit speed burglar
by Bduck1310 January 16, 2017
Get the speed burglar mug.Guy 1: Hey, did you like that porno I showed you?
Guy 2: Yeah, but I had to speed fap because my mom said she was coming in.
Guy 2: Yeah, but I had to speed fap because my mom said she was coming in.
by XXXPORN66642069 January 17, 2017
Get the Speed Fap mug.When you exit the highway and accidentally go 15 over the speed limit on a two lane road because you're used to going highway speeds
by DanTangelo March 20, 2021
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