Trafficologist

After being a television meteorologist for 18 years, I needed a new title as I moved into doing traffic reports on the radio. For the few hours I give those reports, I become a trafficologist. The training to be a real, certified trafficologist is grueling, yet thorough. Still working on that American Trafficology Seal of Approval.

"...and eastbound 64 at the high rise bridge is backed way up. It's constipated. I'm trafficologist, Dave."

by Weatherman Dave May 22, 2009

trafficator

A combination of "traffic" and "indicator". In American English, it means "turn signal".

Don't forget to use the trafficator when you want to let people driving behind you that you want to turn.

by XxmarkoxX May 22, 2011

traffic hottie

Hot girl seen in adjacent vehicle in traffic. Common cause for fender benders. Identifiable by a very hot face.

I saw a traffic hottie yesterday and almost got hit by an 18-wheeler while looking at her.

by pureglaucoma September 16, 2010

catch you in traffic

See someone out and about; encountering someone unexpectedly in public.

Imma beat the fuck outta you if I catch you in traffic!

Bring it, bitch!

by Jilly Beane June 28, 2011

Trafficky

when there is so much traffic you cant even explain it right.

I was trying to make it to work on time but it was so trafficky.

by Fordalicious January 6, 2010

Trafficneer

A driver who practices the pseudoscience of trafficneering by intentionally driving slow or out of the normal traffic pattern in an attempt to break traffic bottlenecks or thwart aggressive drivers. Traits of the trafficneer include high IQ, sincere belief they are serving the greater good by driving slow (time and gas savings) eventhough they themselves are not receiving the time benefit, probably exhibits socialist tendencies on some issues althought not a socialist by nature. The Trafficneer may be fresh out of a fluid dynamics course which, of course, makes them experts in anything that flows with constraints.

The Trafficneer is the exact opposite of an Aggressive Driver who will risk anything to get ahead in traffic: The trafficneer will risk anything to force traffic to conform to his will and idea of how traffic should work.

Note: A trafficneer is not experiencing a fuelirium since the trafficneer is well aware of their actions and those action's effects on other drivers.

The car behind the trafficneer: Why does he always keeps 3 to 5 car lengths ahead of him eventough we are going 20 MPH on a crowded Interstate! I'd pass him if we weren't boxed in!

The trafficneer: The space will break up that traffic bottleneck up ahead and save us and everyone else time. See how the bottleneck broke when we got there! Works everytime! Screw the guy behind me if he doesn't like it, let him pass me...

by Skrabis August 1, 2008

Traffic Tampon

A driver who gets in the middle lane of a multi-lane highway/freeway and proceeds to drive under the speed limit, effectively stopping the flow of traffic.

We were cruising along nicely until we hit a pocket of slow traffic. Everyone was trying to get around a traffic tampon camped in the center lane.

by YB85 March 23, 2011