A curiosity particular to the British Isles, although derived chiefly from the gangsta rap culture of the inner cities of America. Townies are often seen in, as the name suggests, the town centre of any settlement, walking with a distinct bobbing movement akin to that of someone wearing a very heavy backpack. They have a tendency to clothe themselves in unnecessarily large olive-green parkas, tracksuits and plastic baseball caps. This is not dissimilar to a peacock's plumage, with the notable distinction that the peacock's tail feathers are a thing of beauty and make the male bird more attractive to the opposite sex.
On the subject of the opposite sex, it is often possible to observe the phenomenon of the "girl towny". This female variety is not dissimilar to the male variety, except that even more white clothing is worn, in stark contrast to the often orange war-paint worn caked over the faces of female townies. This serves to obliterate the feaures of the "girl townies" and cleverly hide the fact that the male and female of the species are almost indistinguishable without aids to appearance.
Interpersonal relationships among their own groups are often primitive, centred around cheap sexual conquests and who is going to "batter" who. The two are often linked.
The activities displayed by townies often serve to demonstrate a deep-seated aggression, often causing behaviour associated with extreme aggressiveness and violence. This includes a tendency to veer towards a non-towny in the street and "start on" them, at the same time accusing the aforementioned non-towny of doing the same to them. This is often accompanied by swearing, usually "Come on then, you f**king c**t!" or similar aggressive twaddle.
Townies generally have no knowledge of how their sub-culture started, as despite their apparent embracing of black culture, they are usually more likely to take part in a racist assault than normal people like you or I. In fact, any group assault is likely to have townies at the root of the problem.
I hope you have enjoyed reading my definition. If any more evidence/information is required, feel free to watch Crimewatch UK and look at the CCTV footage of street violence. I think you'll be pleasantly surprised. Seriously, do it.
On the subject of the opposite sex, it is often possible to observe the phenomenon of the "girl towny". This female variety is not dissimilar to the male variety, except that even more white clothing is worn, in stark contrast to the often orange war-paint worn caked over the faces of female townies. This serves to obliterate the feaures of the "girl townies" and cleverly hide the fact that the male and female of the species are almost indistinguishable without aids to appearance.
Interpersonal relationships among their own groups are often primitive, centred around cheap sexual conquests and who is going to "batter" who. The two are often linked.
The activities displayed by townies often serve to demonstrate a deep-seated aggression, often causing behaviour associated with extreme aggressiveness and violence. This includes a tendency to veer towards a non-towny in the street and "start on" them, at the same time accusing the aforementioned non-towny of doing the same to them. This is often accompanied by swearing, usually "Come on then, you f**king c**t!" or similar aggressive twaddle.
Townies generally have no knowledge of how their sub-culture started, as despite their apparent embracing of black culture, they are usually more likely to take part in a racist assault than normal people like you or I. In fact, any group assault is likely to have townies at the root of the problem.
I hope you have enjoyed reading my definition. If any more evidence/information is required, feel free to watch Crimewatch UK and look at the CCTV footage of street violence. I think you'll be pleasantly surprised. Seriously, do it.
by The Define-O-Matic April 10, 2004
These are the 21 year old people you see on a night, hanging around on street corners or near benches with their 13 year old girlfriend.
Basically, they are monkeys with cider, if your ever in a fight with a group of these people, go for the alpha male.
He'll be the one with the biggest bottle of cider,if tyou take him down then you have won the fight, the rest of them will run in fear.
Basically, they are monkeys with cider, if your ever in a fight with a group of these people, go for the alpha male.
He'll be the one with the biggest bottle of cider,if tyou take him down then you have won the fight, the rest of them will run in fear.
by dooobey February 20, 2004
Someone who stands in corners waiting to "start summat" with anyone who walks by. Townies usually walk around in "crews" varying from 7 to 20 people. Some common characteristics: Female Townie
Lots of "bling bling"
Pink tracksuit
Random Burberry hairband
Hair tied at the side
Really bad attitude problem
Fag in her hand
A bag that can just about fit a £2 coin in
Hair gelled back really tight
So much make up - orange foundation with a line around the edge of the face
Male Townie
Lots of "bling bling"
Blue Tracksuit
Massive rings on every finger
Really bad attitude problem
Fag in his hand
Over gelled hair
HUGE "diamond" earring to show how "manly" he is
Phrases:
"what da fuk do you think you're staring at?"
"are you starting beef wiv me?"
*cough* ""dirty" gof"
*cough* ""dirty" grunga"
"it's not halloween" *townie "crew" all laugh hysterically*
"i'm gonna bang you up innit?"
"don't get moufy/ loud/ lairy wiv me"
"your mum's fat"
"your mum's a slag"
"i fucked your mum last night"
"yo yo bruv!"
"oi blud!"
"omg did you just see that buff boy/ girl?"
" i had sex with 6 people last night" (and they still think their not whores....)
Townies seem to think that shouting at people makes them look "ard", but when you answer back they all run and tell their brothers/ sisters to "bang you up". The most pathetic thing about them is that they think that their "insults" will upset you. Take "it's not halloween" for instance. They seem to think that this will really bother you. And they also think it's funny. But it doesn't bother people. And it's not funny. I think that they should all sit down and try to come up with something more insulting. But then again, what comes out of their heads is completely useless shit and they're not that intelligent. Swearing is part of their limited vocabulary. "Fuk dis" and "fuck dat". If you ever get into a situation where a townie starts shouting at you, even whilst following you, try not to answer back too much, they'll be about 10 more of them around the corner awaiting calls for backup and about 6 more up the road stealing phones or whatever. Townies should die. Then the world would be a better place. Remember this: if in doubt, kill a townie.
Lots of "bling bling"
Pink tracksuit
Random Burberry hairband
Hair tied at the side
Really bad attitude problem
Fag in her hand
A bag that can just about fit a £2 coin in
Hair gelled back really tight
So much make up - orange foundation with a line around the edge of the face
Male Townie
Lots of "bling bling"
Blue Tracksuit
Massive rings on every finger
Really bad attitude problem
Fag in his hand
Over gelled hair
HUGE "diamond" earring to show how "manly" he is
Phrases:
"what da fuk do you think you're staring at?"
"are you starting beef wiv me?"
*cough* ""dirty" gof"
*cough* ""dirty" grunga"
"it's not halloween" *townie "crew" all laugh hysterically*
"i'm gonna bang you up innit?"
"don't get moufy/ loud/ lairy wiv me"
"your mum's fat"
"your mum's a slag"
"i fucked your mum last night"
"yo yo bruv!"
"oi blud!"
"omg did you just see that buff boy/ girl?"
" i had sex with 6 people last night" (and they still think their not whores....)
Townies seem to think that shouting at people makes them look "ard", but when you answer back they all run and tell their brothers/ sisters to "bang you up". The most pathetic thing about them is that they think that their "insults" will upset you. Take "it's not halloween" for instance. They seem to think that this will really bother you. And they also think it's funny. But it doesn't bother people. And it's not funny. I think that they should all sit down and try to come up with something more insulting. But then again, what comes out of their heads is completely useless shit and they're not that intelligent. Swearing is part of their limited vocabulary. "Fuk dis" and "fuck dat". If you ever get into a situation where a townie starts shouting at you, even whilst following you, try not to answer back too much, they'll be about 10 more of them around the corner awaiting calls for backup and about 6 more up the road stealing phones or whatever. Townies should die. Then the world would be a better place. Remember this: if in doubt, kill a townie.
by Kerry March 6, 2005
A retard who wears awfully passe, tacky clothing, and tasteless "expensive" jewellery. This breed of retard thinks they are at the height of fashion, and that they are "dock hard". Starts fights with everyone of a similar age group, drinks cheap cider and smokes L&B and Roll ups. All female townies have lost their virginity at the age of 12, and they have had at least 3 abortions or kids by the age of 22, and normally has a kid by the age of 16. Townies think they are the most popular people at school, but most people try to avoid them like the plague.
by Clarabelle November 27, 2003
People between the ages of 9-19 that wear tracksuits usually purchased for £5 at the local market.The males will wear stripped jumpers that make them look like escaped convicts(which most of them are)these jumpers will be baby blue and navy in colour.Or alternativly will wear hooded tops with the name of several american cities plastered across the front eg.Boston/NYC/Detroit.They will wear white or navy track-suit bottoms with either red or fake burberry socks that were purchased at the local market for £1.50.These socks will be tucked into their tracksuit bottoms.A baseball cap will be worn with the peak verticaly above their heads for no reason what-so-ever.The females will wear similar hooded tops in white/cream/baby blue/baby pink with fake brands of FCUK/Tommy Hilfiguer plastered on the front these tops will also have been purchased at the local market for £5.They will also wear white/navy tracksuit bottoms or invariably tight jeans.Both sex's will where astonishing amounts of tacky soverein rings/clown fob pendants/3inch chains.The females will often be seen pregnant or pushing around a pram with 3/4 other small children following for around the age of 12.These children will usually be called names such as Chantel/Santilla/Tallon/Tyrese.The males will be seen in riot vans/police cars or any other such form of restraint.Both sexes will be seen standing on a street corner with large bottles of cheap cider and they will start a fight with anyone within a 100 mile radius that isnt in their posse/crew/massive(these are their stupid names for their group of friends/incestial family)
Townies will often be heard saying the following
*Orrrr Norr
*Ya Mam
*R U Callin Ma Mam?
*R U Startin Me U?
*Get 'ere u lil twat am gunna lay u out
*Chantel get back ere u u fuckin twat
*Fuck Fuck Fuck Fuck (for lack of a better word.)
*Orrrr Norr
*Ya Mam
*R U Callin Ma Mam?
*R U Startin Me U?
*Get 'ere u lil twat am gunna lay u out
*Chantel get back ere u u fuckin twat
*Fuck Fuck Fuck Fuck (for lack of a better word.)
by *Hannah* January 31, 2004
A person with a lack of ability to talk. using words like innit, nah m8 and geeza
they have changed the good old meaning of RnB or Hip Hop to a crap pop sham, with sluts who cant sing and huuge groups of boys who think its hard to tightly squeeze their crotch (though it doesnt hurt as theres nothing there).
Wearing tracksuits, burburry (fake)
Been smoking since they first heard the word ciggarette.
Girls wearing, incredibly short skirts, not even a skirt, more a belt, gelled back hair, with badly blonde highlights.
They add 'innit' in every possible space of a sentance.
They hate anyone more attractive, intellegent, niceer, better than them.
and therefore owe them a good beating.
Their arch enemy: Anyone with their own opinion. Alternative people
they have changed the good old meaning of RnB or Hip Hop to a crap pop sham, with sluts who cant sing and huuge groups of boys who think its hard to tightly squeeze their crotch (though it doesnt hurt as theres nothing there).
Wearing tracksuits, burburry (fake)
Been smoking since they first heard the word ciggarette.
Girls wearing, incredibly short skirts, not even a skirt, more a belt, gelled back hair, with badly blonde highlights.
They add 'innit' in every possible space of a sentance.
They hate anyone more attractive, intellegent, niceer, better than them.
and therefore owe them a good beating.
Their arch enemy: Anyone with their own opinion. Alternative people
Townie: ah bruv, iz u startin m8, coz i 'as a big bruva dat killed like 10 ppl last wk, n like neva got caught. innit
Someone: I'm sorry, i didnt quite get that, what did you just say?
Townie: u iz a batty
Someone: sorry, what?
Someone: I'm sorry, i didnt quite get that, what did you just say?
Townie: u iz a batty
Someone: sorry, what?
by Ella January 28, 2004
The Average Male Townie:
> Wears fake burberry cap
> Wears fake burberry cap at a 360 degree angle
> Smokes about 50 fags a day
> Drinks anything as long as it has alcohol in it
> Wears "trackies" and bright white nike trainers
> Hates anyone who is not a part of the Townie Race
> Tucks "trackie bottoms" into their white umbro / fake burberry socks
> Refers to fellow female townies as "mah bitches" or "mah hoes"
> Has brown hair with the ends dyed - meant to be blonde but ends up orange
> Wears "Schott" jacket - 100% polyester and very poofy with the label "Schott" splashed along the back of it. Some townies unable to afford such expensive clothing tend to wear "Scott" jackets
> Have their ear pierced with a huge fake diamond earring
> Wears excessive amounts of Lynx aftershave and seems to believe that all normal humans want to smell like that too - tend to spray aftershave in anyone-who-is-not-a-townies face
> Refer to fellow male townies as "bruv"
> Wears many gold chains and rings
> Have a very short vocabulary
> Enjoys listening to hip hop, R 'n' B, and any female who does not wear much clothing at all
> Shoplift from their local market
> Is never seen without their mobile phones - always in the latest model
> Hangs around in large gangs
> Hangs around by places like One Stop and the 'green'
The Average Female Townie:
> Has excessive facial piercings
> Has dyed platinum blond hair with about two inches of natural coloured roots showing
> Hates anyone who is not a part of the Townie Race
> Wears tiny little tops which show as much breast as physically possible
> Wears tiny little skirts which are shorter than a normal persons belt
> Have a very short vocabulary
> Wears clothes by the label "Playboy"
> Always makes sure that their thongs are on show
> Have their hair scraped back into a high ponytail or bun
> Also wear bright white Nike trainers
> Wears many gold chains and rings
> Wears layers and layers of foundation
> Wears layers and layers of fake tan over that
> Are pregnant by the age of 10
> Also wear "Schott" jackets
> Hangs around in large groups
> Hangs around in places like One Stop or the 'green'
> Listens to hip hop, R 'n' B and any male who wears excessive amounts of chains and who possesses a six pack.
> Shoplift from their local market
There are many of this species about - they are spreading like a disease. You must be cautious at all times as you may find yourself gradually adapting to their kind. If you see anyone of this kind approaching, turn around and walk away. DO NOT APPROACH THESE SPECIES.
> Wears fake burberry cap
> Wears fake burberry cap at a 360 degree angle
> Smokes about 50 fags a day
> Drinks anything as long as it has alcohol in it
> Wears "trackies" and bright white nike trainers
> Hates anyone who is not a part of the Townie Race
> Tucks "trackie bottoms" into their white umbro / fake burberry socks
> Refers to fellow female townies as "mah bitches" or "mah hoes"
> Has brown hair with the ends dyed - meant to be blonde but ends up orange
> Wears "Schott" jacket - 100% polyester and very poofy with the label "Schott" splashed along the back of it. Some townies unable to afford such expensive clothing tend to wear "Scott" jackets
> Have their ear pierced with a huge fake diamond earring
> Wears excessive amounts of Lynx aftershave and seems to believe that all normal humans want to smell like that too - tend to spray aftershave in anyone-who-is-not-a-townies face
> Refer to fellow male townies as "bruv"
> Wears many gold chains and rings
> Have a very short vocabulary
> Enjoys listening to hip hop, R 'n' B, and any female who does not wear much clothing at all
> Shoplift from their local market
> Is never seen without their mobile phones - always in the latest model
> Hangs around in large gangs
> Hangs around by places like One Stop and the 'green'
The Average Female Townie:
> Has excessive facial piercings
> Has dyed platinum blond hair with about two inches of natural coloured roots showing
> Hates anyone who is not a part of the Townie Race
> Wears tiny little tops which show as much breast as physically possible
> Wears tiny little skirts which are shorter than a normal persons belt
> Have a very short vocabulary
> Wears clothes by the label "Playboy"
> Always makes sure that their thongs are on show
> Have their hair scraped back into a high ponytail or bun
> Also wear bright white Nike trainers
> Wears many gold chains and rings
> Wears layers and layers of foundation
> Wears layers and layers of fake tan over that
> Are pregnant by the age of 10
> Also wear "Schott" jackets
> Hangs around in large groups
> Hangs around in places like One Stop or the 'green'
> Listens to hip hop, R 'n' B and any male who wears excessive amounts of chains and who possesses a six pack.
> Shoplift from their local market
There are many of this species about - they are spreading like a disease. You must be cautious at all times as you may find yourself gradually adapting to their kind. If you see anyone of this kind approaching, turn around and walk away. DO NOT APPROACH THESE SPECIES.
Here are a few expressions that this dangerous kind might use:
"Sick bruv" - cool or great
"Yer ma'e" - Yes
"I'll give ya beats" - I want to hurt you
"Bling" - jewellery
"Ma homies" - my friends
"Your mum" - Definition UNKNOWN. Many people have tried to define this fascinating expression into English and I have reached the conclusion that in fact, it is just a phrase in which townies resort to using because they cannot think of anything else to say.
"Sick bruv" - cool or great
"Yer ma'e" - Yes
"I'll give ya beats" - I want to hurt you
"Bling" - jewellery
"Ma homies" - my friends
"Your mum" - Definition UNKNOWN. Many people have tried to define this fascinating expression into English and I have reached the conclusion that in fact, it is just a phrase in which townies resort to using because they cannot think of anything else to say.
by Trixabelle May 3, 2005