church 

A boring-ass place where all you do is listen to some robed asswipe yap about some bullshit from the bible. You also get to sing gay gospel songs. It usually lasts 2 hours, but some churches can go up to 4-7 hours.

Kid: Man, my mom just made me go to church. it sucked ass.

Friend: Man that's gay. There goes two hours of your life wasted.

Kid: Two? Try five.

Friend: Fuuuuuuucccck..................

church by Wasabimoto May 9, 2007

Church 

Slang for any type of departure phrase.

Dave: Well, this is beat. I'll catch ya later.
MJ: Yeah, I got things to do.
Dave: Alright, peace son.
MJ: Church, nigga!

Church by Spicky & Girl February 10, 2008

church 

Church unfortunatly has been twisted by christians and ruined what it was meant to be like, the same goes for christians and how they have ruined christianity, if you read the bible(new testament) you will see how it is supposed to be done and be truly amazed because its awesome.

Man in white gown with candle is not church its just boring. People getting healed and being happy and excited thats what church should be and can be because jesus is alive.

church by JoelB April 25, 2006

Church 

A place to Worship God our father. Gods house. Where all his people gather to speak of his beautiful word.

In church The pastor Spoke of Jesus the Son of God.

Church by Tiffany D July 2, 2005

church 

1:where you tell your parents your going to be for the next few hours, when in reality,youll be at your boyfriends house,fucking him

"hey mom? im going to church in an hour. have you seen my red dress? the one with the slit up the side?

church by oogie boogie jen August 26, 2003

church 

Somewhere you are forced to go on sunday mornings. If you manage to stay concious throughout the whole thing, kudos to you. It can sometimes last for hours on end.

See also torture and suicide

1) Boy 1: Hey, you wanna come over and play Xbox on sunday morning?
Boy 2: Can't.
Boy 1: How come?
Boy 2: My mom is making me go to church.
Boy 1: Man, that blows.
Boy 2: Tell me about it. I might have to shoot myself after baldy's sermon.
Boy 1: Good luck, man.

church by chloecoolness August 22, 2007

church 

An increasingly prevalent and defining aspect of the church in America(Churchus Americanus), is its symbiotic relationship with the gas station or convenience store. Scientists have been unable to ascertain exactly how they benefit each other, but the Church and the Gas Station/Convenience Store are frequently found near each other. This relationship has vexed scientists for the last 50 years, when it was first observed. They are not mutually dependent, but they seem to prosper more when together, and Churches independent of Gas Stations and 7/11 are becoming endangered. 7/11 tends to bond more exclusively with liberal denomination churches. AM/PM is far more versatile but works well with the more traditional and conservative churches.

Ex. 1

"By god's will, in this mighty Church, there will be pound cake to dip in orange soda at communion."

church by therapod November 29, 2012