Attorney 

A legislator-in-training who hopes to grow up to be a real politician some day. See job security.

Most legilators either have been, or eventually become attorneys, who practice the very law that legislators write, leading to a horrific conflict of interest between the two professions, by which government of the people is by the attorneys, for the attorneys.

Attorney by Downstrike September 13, 2004

Attorney General 

An Attorney General is when a doctor is giving you a prostate exam and he stimulates it to the point of pleasure and release. It's an acronym for Anal G-spot

I went to the doctor yesterday and had a visit with the Attorney General.

Attorney General by Dr. Feelgooder October 30, 2013

Attorney 

Someone who encourages another person (usually, a friend) to pursue illegal, socially unacceptable, and/or dangerous activities. The encouraged activity will usually result in damage or suffering to the encouraged party, eliciting good times and hilarity for the attorney and other spectators.

This use originated in the Hunter Thompson book "Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas" which was later adapted into a film by Terry Gilliam.

As your attorney, I advise you to blow off work and get ripped with me.

As your attorney, I advise you to smoke 10 bowls in a row and then ride your bike down this steep hill.

Attorney by dodmedium March 22, 2012

attorney 

A person that never creates wealth. An attorney waits for some other entity to do something, make something,or have something so that they may attempt to pry some of that wealth away from the entity which actually did domething useful.

Often confused with a duece.

Typical habitat is a golf course.

Jim: I just got a letter from an attorney; we are being sued.

John: Why?

Jim: According to the letter from this attorney, his client wrecked her car last week in front of our business because she was so surprised by all of the cars in our employee parking lot.

John: (Sarcastically) Well there you go, I told you should not employ so many people!

attorney by skimahorn February 20, 2008

attorney 

An assmonkey with a college degree.

Harvard breeds assmonkeys.

attorney by Rick January 23, 2004

attorneys 

The largest organized crime syndicate ever devised.

attorneys
hey lets pretend we care about people and help them in their greatest time of need. But we'll make it so complicated and expensive that we'll suck even more money from these stupid losers to make them feel even more stupid and completely helpless and poor that they won't even be able to buy bullets to go postal on everyone that deserves it.

attorneys by psychobabbleculvercity March 30, 2011

Attorney girlfriend 

Aw what? Nobody else wants to cover it? Ok. Well, I guess it's up to me to Op Ed the shit out of this situation.

Hym "What happened to the attorney girlfriend? Is that not a thing anymore? Is it impossible to love women after one of them fucks a retard behind your back? *sigh* Haaaaaa-shit... That kind of bums me out..."

Attorney girlfriend by Hym Iam December 28, 2022