tom cruise
tom cruise by Zach Dierks December 9, 2008
Get the tom cruise mug.
Tom Cruise
v. to act like a complete dick, to believe oneself to be God's gift to mankind, to be arrogant mixed with retardation.
- often abreviated to TC.
- often abreviated to TC.
Quote: "To Tom Cruise or not to Tom Cruise that is the dusch bag's question."
Man 1: My neigbor has be TC'n it to much lately.
Man 2: Yo man I'll suplex him if he be TC'n to much
Man 1: My neigbor has be TC'n it to much lately.
Man 2: Yo man I'll suplex him if he be TC'n to much
Tom Cruise by John Faucett June 10, 2008
Tom Cruise
Tom Cruise is one of the only two actors to have seven consecutive $100 million plus blockbusters on their resume. Further, Forbes ranked Cruise as the most powerful celebrity in 2006. Obviously, Tom could never get these numbers and the associated prestige without being a fan favorite. However, beginning sometime in the early 2000s, it became somewhat fashionable to hate Tom Cruise.
Tom is also notorious for being a "midget", although he really isn't (at 5'7", he stands roughly the same height as the ever popular Joaquin Phoenix). Unfortunately, Tom fell in love with an exceptionally tall woman, 5'9" Katie Holmes, who is 5" taller than the average woman in the U.S. Katie sometimes wears 3" heels, which brings her height to 6'. This dramatic difference really does make poor Tom look like a midget.
In short, Tom used to be a popular actor as evidenced by his numerous blockbuster hits. He was even named People's Sexiest Man Alive in 1990. However, at some point he seems to have been brainwashed and is now a raving lunatic who practices the myth of scientology. There are disturbing reports of him cannibalizing Katie’s placenta, too.
Tom is also notorious for being a "midget", although he really isn't (at 5'7", he stands roughly the same height as the ever popular Joaquin Phoenix). Unfortunately, Tom fell in love with an exceptionally tall woman, 5'9" Katie Holmes, who is 5" taller than the average woman in the U.S. Katie sometimes wears 3" heels, which brings her height to 6'. This dramatic difference really does make poor Tom look like a midget.
In short, Tom used to be a popular actor as evidenced by his numerous blockbuster hits. He was even named People's Sexiest Man Alive in 1990. However, at some point he seems to have been brainwashed and is now a raving lunatic who practices the myth of scientology. There are disturbing reports of him cannibalizing Katie’s placenta, too.
Guy 1: Does Tom Cruise really drink toilet water?
Guy 2: I heard that Tom drinks out of the toilet because he can't reach the sink.
Guy 2: I heard that Tom drinks out of the toilet because he can't reach the sink.
Tom Cruise by HuskyFan86 May 25, 2007
tom cruise
Verb. To jump up and down on a couch overly excited by something, often a person of the opposite sex. The person who Tom Cruises is usually considered an idiot.
When Allie realized that Jim had come to the party, she started Tom Cruise-ing until we had to call the 911 to calm her down.
tom cruise by SiLvEr STARSx May 25, 2006
tom cruise
tom cruise acts like a douche off screen constantly, plus i think he is suffering from reality angst, which we are suffering from. get this guy on drug for fuck's sake
tom is a douche
cruise is a bag
tom cruise = major douchebag
tom is a douche
cruise is a bag
tom cruise = major douchebag
tom cruise by xvxununun October 10, 2006
Tom cruise
Noun:
Hollywood dwelling Sciencetologist creature that jumps on couches and spawns deformed children.
Hollywood dwelling Sciencetologist creature that jumps on couches and spawns deformed children.
"Damn! Tom Cruise was really good in Rain Man!"
"Yeah, but ever sense he started banging Katie Holms and couches, I must say that he sucks ass."
"Yeah, but ever sense he started banging Katie Holms and couches, I must say that he sucks ass."
Tom cruise by I swear to drunk, I'm not God! October 25, 2006
Tom Cruise
I'm in love (yippee!!!) and I hate psychiatrists (fucking nut jobs, all of them, ALL OF THEM), who are out to control the world (trembles for a few moments) and drop hydrogen bombs on everybody (BIG ones, yeahhh). Hey, have you seen my girlfriend? (BOINNNGGG!!) I'm wild! You're cool, too! (Pulls hair out, laughs.) No, seriously? Oh. (Grows sullen.) Oh. (Grows REALLY sullen.) Oh. Why would you want to do that to me? No, seriously, why would you want to do that to me? Why? Why? Why would you want to do that to me? (Jumps up on couch, pulls dramatic stance, couch falls backward, he crawls up to kneel on the front of the seat.) They've hated me ever since I played a veteran of the Great Galactic War between the Thetans and the Engrammatised Ones. (Goes boggle-eyed, cackles, shrieks ...,) We're all going to be bigger than Oprah! (YAY!) And it makes me sick, you know that? Why isn't everyone looking at me RIGHT NOW? And you know what? I'm NOT GAY!!! Mimi! Ha! Nicole! Ha! Penelope! Ha! Katie, aww, KATIIEEE!!! Ha-haaaaaaaaaaaa! Here, I can lick my own balls, seriously. Just watch me ... (Licks own balls, audience stampede out of the auditorium.)
Tom Cruise by Fearman April 16, 2008