Softies

A game played by two men, in which each principle removes his pants and, standing face to face with his opponent, swings his limp penis against the other's. The first person to become erect loses and is then subjected to an assault and homophobic slurs.

Keith and James played a game of Softies. Now Keith has a black eye, and evidently he's a fag.

by CamShaft January 19, 2014

old softy

A person with a tough or stern exterior but a secret heart of gold, such as a lenient authority figure.

You're an old softy, letting those kids off the hook like that.

by other findings include December 8, 2013

tossin' softies

flacid, male ejaculation (involuntary pelvic thrusts may occur)

All up in da club, tossin' softies.

by tossin softies April 30, 2011

sportin a softy

When a guy's got a limp penis while naked in public. The power to NOT get a boner is essential whether at a clothing optional beach, taking a gang shower, going skinny dipping with your friends, wearing a speedo, at a nudie party, just hangin it or you are a professional nudie.

Justin: "Wow, good times last night."
Jason: "Didn't think it was going to turn into a nudie party."
Chad: "Yeah, nothin like sportin a softy and just hangin it."

by Nudie Dude August 25, 2006

The Masters Softie

When your getting a blowjob while watching The Masters and your interrupted by a call from your Wife.

My bitch wife called and ruined my blowjob and I was left with The Masters Softie.

by Meanie Lips April 9, 2017

Thumb in a softie

The action of inserting a flacid or semi flacid penis into ones sexual partner using a thumb or finger in an attempt to engage in coitus. The action is usually performed after the consumption of a considerable amount of alcohol and is regarded as a token effort at sexual intercourse.

"I was absolutely twatted and knew that there was no way that I could possibly perform, despite the fact that she was absolutely stunning and horny as a goat. I knew that if we didn't have sex she would be upset but I was drunk as a sailor. Therefore the only possible course of action was to thumb in a softie.

by toilet joe October 15, 2009

thumbing in a softie

The term given to pushing a flaccid penis into the vagina.

Drunk dude: Im too pissed, its never gonna work
Female: Cmon work with it otherwise ill fuck your friends
Drunk dude: Well alright ill try thumbing in a softie.

by Jared Ellis January 18, 2008