probably one of the whackest towns you will ever have the displeasure of being in or hearing of. its small and has way too many people in it because everyone from NY insists on moving here. dont bother driving anywhere on the weekends...theres too many tourists causing mad traffic. its either filled with a) dirty ass icp dirtbags who live for sitting outside the mall on friday nights b) "minorities" who actually put some excitement in the newspaper but arent minorities anymore c) hicks...enough said or d) skanky ass dirty std having little smuts. its boring as fuck so everyone does the same shit....drink, smoke, or fuck. and then the 5.0 stay up our ass but its not our fault there aint shit else to do. besides go to walmart....or the excitment filled stroud mall. STOP COMING HERE MOTHER FUCKERS!
by bitchBETCHbitch March 11, 2009
Get the east stroudsburg mug.The self-proclaimed "Pride of the Poconos," Stroudsburg High School is famous for many things, including its lunchroom staff, who currently collectively hold the world record for fitting the largest sticks possible up their asses, its splendid security staff, whose captain won this year's Greased Pig Contest (although he soon realized it wasn't a pig, it was actually one of the other security officers), its highly nutritional and incredibly delicious lunches, consisting mostly of greasy, overcooked pizzas and calzones, and half-heartedly assembled hoagies (although, by the way the ham tastes, it would appear that they used the pig from that contest listed above to make them), its nursing staff's incredible ability to cure any illness or injury with ice (not their fault, they're not allowed to give out anything else), and most importantly of all, its incredible climate control, enabling the history hallway to be a sauna, while the science wing can be magically transformed into wetlands overnight. Oh, and did I forget to mention the new classrooms? Yes, they brought them in on the back of a few flat-bed trucks, and now they sit in the parking lots, taking up valuable parking space that the school board is always griping about not having. ...They're also the only rooms in the school that have air conditioning. Doesn't this all make you wish you went here?
We love Stroudsburg High School...
Lunch Monitor: "Show me your pass."
Innocent Student: "I show you a pass every day. Can't you trust that I have one?"
Lunch Monitor: "Show me your pass."
Innocent Student: "You saw it yesterday, it was filled out for the entire week."
Lunch Monitor: "Show me your pass."
Innocent Student: "I have showed you a pass every single day since the beginning of the school year. It is now March. Don't you trust I have it?"
Lunch Monitor: "Show me your pass, or sit back down and shut up."
Security Officer: "Yep. I've been workin' this here job for goin' on fifteen years. I've seen it all."
Student: *Takes bite of hamburger* *CLINK!*
Student: "Oh, God, I'm vomiting blood! I can't control it, it - it's everywhere! Oh my God, do something - is that a lung?! Is that a lung?!?!?! THAT'S A LUNG!!! HELP ME!!!"
Nurse: "Well, I really wish I could do more, but would you like some ice?"
Student: "For the love of God, call an ambulance!!! Please, just -" *glurgglurgleglurg...*
Nurse: "You know, I better make this a double pack."
Student: *Opens locker in science hallway, finds strange tropical fungus growing on english book* "What the..."
Principal: "What's going on in the history wing? I haven't heard anything from them up there in weeks."
Teacher: *Goes to investigate* "What on earth?... Oh, dear God, they've all fried to death, how could this have - oh, no, the sun's coming out!!! Run, children, run, before it's too latearghgaslfjakslf..."
Principal: "Where are Modulars 1 and 2?!"
Teacher: "Um... They're... Kind of... in the creek."
Principal: "...WHAT?!"
Teacher: "Well, maybe it wasn't such a good idea to get separate classrooms that people can tow away as a senior prank..."
Lunch Monitor: "Show me your pass."
Innocent Student: "I show you a pass every day. Can't you trust that I have one?"
Lunch Monitor: "Show me your pass."
Innocent Student: "You saw it yesterday, it was filled out for the entire week."
Lunch Monitor: "Show me your pass."
Innocent Student: "I have showed you a pass every single day since the beginning of the school year. It is now March. Don't you trust I have it?"
Lunch Monitor: "Show me your pass, or sit back down and shut up."
Security Officer: "Yep. I've been workin' this here job for goin' on fifteen years. I've seen it all."
Student: *Takes bite of hamburger* *CLINK!*
Student: "Oh, God, I'm vomiting blood! I can't control it, it - it's everywhere! Oh my God, do something - is that a lung?! Is that a lung?!?!?! THAT'S A LUNG!!! HELP ME!!!"
Nurse: "Well, I really wish I could do more, but would you like some ice?"
Student: "For the love of God, call an ambulance!!! Please, just -" *glurgglurgleglurg...*
Nurse: "You know, I better make this a double pack."
Student: *Opens locker in science hallway, finds strange tropical fungus growing on english book* "What the..."
Principal: "What's going on in the history wing? I haven't heard anything from them up there in weeks."
Teacher: *Goes to investigate* "What on earth?... Oh, dear God, they've all fried to death, how could this have - oh, no, the sun's coming out!!! Run, children, run, before it's too latearghgaslfjakslf..."
Principal: "Where are Modulars 1 and 2?!"
Teacher: "Um... They're... Kind of... in the creek."
Principal: "...WHAT?!"
Teacher: "Well, maybe it wasn't such a good idea to get separate classrooms that people can tow away as a senior prank..."
by Concerned Member of the Class of 'O8 July 22, 2006
Get the stroudsburg high school mug.Related Words
STROUSS
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A state of utter destruction that results from a verbal or physical altercation with a Stross
Similar to: owned, wrecked, powned, shutdown, destroyed, obliterated
Similar to: owned, wrecked, powned, shutdown, destroyed, obliterated
Sam: "the relation between interest rates and the exchange rate is inverse"
Ben: "you mean linear?"
Class: "get strossed"
Ben: "you mean linear?"
Class: "get strossed"
by eco123 August 4, 2019
Get the strossed mug.After a 4-Day run at the Days Inn I was awoken by a knock from the cleaning lady. I had no choice but to strausskhandersloot it.
by tommy Ghostbuster December 13, 2012
Get the StraussKhanderSloot mug.UPDATE: OCTOBER 2008
The last this writer saw of the school, pandemonium reigned supreme over any attempts at control that may or may not have been attempted by the faculty and staff.
Two lockdowns in two years in response to terrorist threats of squirrel hunting have provoked a new, pseudo-uniform dress code in an attempt to get the kids to settle down and focus on learning. The kids, being kids, found this to be a travesty on par with slavery and the Holocaust, and retaliated with sullen replies of "this sucks" and "I don't wanna wear no stupid-a** uniforms." The administration responded by cracking down on the dress code. They let everyone know that "slate" is not an acceptable color for pants, ONLY BLACK!!! Also, they were kind enough to simplify people's lives by making sure they only had to wear shoes with one color! Anyone who dares to wear shoes with different color shoelaces, or a different color sole than the rest of the shoe will be punished like the commies they are!!!
Don't worry, the culprits of these acts were properly sentenced - I mean, reprimanded.
Additionally, the existence of a padded room in one of the middle schools was recently revealed. One can only imagine what must be going on in there to warrant a padded room for 9 year olds.
This reporter regrets to inform you they are no longer able to be on the front lines, having matriculated, but contacts on the inside are getting news out. Don't worry, Stroudsburgians! There's hope.
There's always hope.
The last this writer saw of the school, pandemonium reigned supreme over any attempts at control that may or may not have been attempted by the faculty and staff.
Two lockdowns in two years in response to terrorist threats of squirrel hunting have provoked a new, pseudo-uniform dress code in an attempt to get the kids to settle down and focus on learning. The kids, being kids, found this to be a travesty on par with slavery and the Holocaust, and retaliated with sullen replies of "this sucks" and "I don't wanna wear no stupid-a** uniforms." The administration responded by cracking down on the dress code. They let everyone know that "slate" is not an acceptable color for pants, ONLY BLACK!!! Also, they were kind enough to simplify people's lives by making sure they only had to wear shoes with one color! Anyone who dares to wear shoes with different color shoelaces, or a different color sole than the rest of the shoe will be punished like the commies they are!!!
Don't worry, the culprits of these acts were properly sentenced - I mean, reprimanded.
Additionally, the existence of a padded room in one of the middle schools was recently revealed. One can only imagine what must be going on in there to warrant a padded room for 9 year olds.
This reporter regrets to inform you they are no longer able to be on the front lines, having matriculated, but contacts on the inside are getting news out. Don't worry, Stroudsburgians! There's hope.
There's always hope.
by Wearing whatever they please February 27, 2009
Get the Stroudsburg High School mug.Accused: I have upset the government & they have paid someone to fasley accuse me of rape!
Attorney: As your attorney I advise you that you have been Straussanged you poor bastard.
Attorney: As your attorney I advise you that you have been Straussanged you poor bastard.
by Jnarimbaud June 11, 2011
Get the Straussanged mug.by I fucking want to kill u!!!! May 11, 2016
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