The ultimate trump card. When you're down and out it's the last defense you have against people trying to justify your repositioning in society.
Hym "A prime example of the 'I have kids' defense is KRISTI NOEM. In her interview after it was revealed that she shot her own dog, she DESPERATELY tried to employ this defense before being shoved out of the spotlight. 'I'm a mother! I wanna go upies! Not downies! Nooooooooooo!' Heheheheh... And a more recent example is Andrew Tate's interview after getting out recently. 'I have kids! I'm supposed to be able to do whatever I want! Anything and everything is justifiable when you have kids!' Ha! It's ALWAYS THE CASE! He stole? He had to steal for the kids! Why does policy need to change? The kids? Why did we bomb those kids? The kids of course. But your kids are just you. Nothing changed when you had them. Maybe, socially, you moved into the class of people that other people have to give a shit about by way of extension. That's not real a change though. Your kids = You. Their inflated value exists only in relationship to you. Saying 'MY kids are more important than anything' is no different that saying 'I'm more important than anything.' You. Same thing."
by Hym Iam August 24, 2024
Get the The 'I have kids' defensemug. It's when a parent or guardian brings physical harm to their child, it could be out of anger, enjoyment, annoyance, etc.
Parent/Guardian: I don't like the way my kids look so i beat my kids. *shoots son in the arm* Ha ha take that brat.
Son: Ow, that hurt. Please stop beating me, i'm your kid.
Son: Ow, that hurt. Please stop beating me, i'm your kid.
by IBeatMyKids April 20, 2022
Get the I beat my kidsmug. Used when someone does'nt want to explain or emphasis something more and wants to move on, other than the person actually kidding.
by na01 December 11, 2022
Get the I was kiddingmug. Babe I don't wanna have sex right now, I've been craving watching some Honey I Shrunk The Kids Shit.
by Temiz August 17, 2023
Get the Honey I Shrunk the Kids Shitmug. An I-kid (I for internet) is a person born into internet prominence and exposed to the internet at a young age (often Generation Z), making them desensitised to the internet, perceiving extreme things as normal. People such as lolicons, furries, VTuber fans, ERPers, femboys and Coomers fit into this category.
John: Hey Jerry, what is femboy Garfield?
Jerry: Just something those I-kids thought up. Best not to google it, you know, with blissful ignorance and all that.
Jerry: Just something those I-kids thought up. Best not to google it, you know, with blissful ignorance and all that.
by BarrelbiteBulletblast December 22, 2022
Get the I-kidmug. If you decoded this message using the record of Ashley's song in WarioWare: Touched!, you probably had way too much time on your hands.
I wonder what happens if I play around with the record like a toy...
(spins record at fast speed, hears "I have granted kids to hell")
Oh no! I think my parents heard what I did! Now they're gonna kill me and file an FCC complaint.
(spins record at fast speed, hears "I have granted kids to hell")
Oh no! I think my parents heard what I did! Now they're gonna kill me and file an FCC complaint.
by The Real Driller August 19, 2023
Get the I have granted kids to hellmug. means how uksrfhaiafdlfjdkahfkjalfas
by semen eater 42 March 17, 2022
Get the I like little kids the forty seventhmug.