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testimoany

Exaggerated /overly-dramatic court-statements given by one or more somewhat-less-than-honest "witnesses", and which they heavily embellish with lots of whiny wheezes and crocodile-tears-drenched sighs.
Unfortunately, this strategy can actually be surprisingly effective in convincing a judge/jury of a defendant's guilt, especially if the "witness" is female --- last I heard, there are untold multitudes of totally-innocent men in prison right now --- some even on death row --- who are there merely because of the lying testimoany of some attention-seeking/money-hungry b***h and a few of her equally-conscience-impaired hussy-cronies!
by QuacksO December 25, 2018
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testimony payments

Regularly-doled-out amounts of cash paid to someone as reimbursement for his "cooperative" court-related actions, either for his providing false/exaggerated trial-statements to make the cases run in favor of the "benefactor", or as "hush money" to KEEP the person FROM testifying AGAINST his "benefactor".
A couple months ago I was a witness to a shoplifting where the police were called, so I secretly spoke with the thieves and offered to keep quiet about what I'd seen if they would each slip me fifty bucks a month for the next three years. They willingly agreed, but as of now I have yet to receive one red cent of my promised testimony payments.
by QuacksO December 25, 2018
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Related Words

testimoney

Refers to one or more cash-bribes paid to someone who is willing to lie in court on behalf of his/her "benefactor", either to get said cash-flasher off the hook for a crime that he did indeed commit, or to wrongfully convict someone else who either is completely innocent or could not have been expected to behave differently from how he acted (i.e, he has a physical/mental disability, he'd had no idea whatsoever that he was doing other than what was acceptable, there were extenuating circumstances and/or there was "more to the story" than the plaintiffs were letting on, etc.).
If you are sufficiently attractive and/or possess a sufficiently-convincing manner, you may not need to seek "regular" employment --- you may be able to subsist very comfortably on the testimoney of others who need a "vindicating/corroborating witness".
by QuacksO December 26, 2018
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Testiclez

Testiclez .. is the Greek God of Fornitude

Born with great intellect, innate leadership skills..

and the drive to inspire millions to become true American patriots.
Testiclez, The Greek God of Fornitude
by J Cabo January 4, 2019
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testitis

"test-eye-tiss"
when you have a test so you fake sick and miss the day
Teacher: "where's jack"
Student: "oh, he's sick"
Student 2: "yeah, he's got testitis"
by RickJustice February 27, 2019
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Testicular fireball

When you stick your testicles in a girls vagina while they are on there period
Hey dude i just got the best testicular fireball ever from that one girl at the party
by Fuck me daddy papi March 8, 2019
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testelocus

Not being able to ejaculate into the named fiona
Testelocus of the genitals
by Mattrick90 March 10, 2019
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