Crap Shag 

Descriptive term used to describe the satisfaction value within a given sexual experience. Crap adj describes poor performance of either gender. Shag noun the sexual act.

The guy I was with last night was such a crap shag that I didnt have time to focus on the ceiling before he came and it was all over

Crap Shag by Shell225 October 30, 2008

Crap of the crop 

The opposite of "Cream of the crop"

We maintain a list of our worst five suppliers and we keep an eye on them. These are the crap of the crop folks!

Crap of the crop by Dima R. March 29, 2009

Crap-cramp 

Acute pains in the abandomen as a result of going on the lash and forgetting to take a shit. Not very funny, just painful. Poo breaks are advised.

Dave: "Shiiiit, didn't go for a poo break."
Tom: "Mate you're sure to get the crippling crap-cramps."

Aloysius: "See how that girl's walking? Got crap-cramp."

Answerphone: "Sorry, can't get to the phone right now, suffering from crap-cramp."

Molly: "Going for a shit."
Edith: "Why?"

Crap-cramp by Udrai Scheit February 27, 2010

Crap out the hoof

To plan on going crazy, drinking a lot, dancing all night, having wild sex. Typical saturday evening stuff. Crapping out the hoof usually ends in a big headache and loss of memory the next morning.

Person 1: Let's crap out the hoof tonight.
Person 2: hell yeah!

Crap out the hoof by Bekhouwejoh November 8, 2014

crap on a shingle

1.) Same as "Shit on a Shingle"

4½ oz. spam
1 cups milk
2 tbs. butter
¼ cup flour
Salt and pepper
6 slices bread
Melt butter in pan, add Spam. Cook 2-3 minutes to brown. Add flour and mix with dried beef . Add milk (reserve ¼ cup for later), salt & pepper. Bring to boil. Add remaining milk to thin to your desired likeness. Serve over toast or waffles.

Hey sweetle, that was some good crap on a shingle.

crap on a shingle by jeffbo April 10, 2009

crap shot 

A phrase used to describe something of which the chances of achieving said thing are so low, doing so feels like winning the lottery.

Father: Don't get depressed about not getting that scholarship son; it was a crap shot at best. Out of the thousands that applied for it, they awarded it to two, maybe three people. I’ve applied for jobs I knew I was 100% qualified for and would have made an excellent employee. I never heard anything.

Son: Why?

Father: Because they get so many applicants that someone even seeing my resume is a 500 to 1 shot.

Son: Rather like that scholarship. Although I had the grades and other requirements, so many other people applied that the odds of even hearing from them were like one on a thousand.

Father: Exactly, it was a crap shot. But, although it’s a crap shot, keep trying. Some day you’ll be the one guy in a 1000 they select.

crap shot by Anonymous August 8, 2004

Crap-tinted Glasses 

An idiom for pessimism. In other words, the opposite of rose-tinted glasses.

Seeing as everyone sucks to much to give pessimism an idiom, the maker of the definition invented crap-tinted glasses.

Crap-tinted Glasses by flashadams May 24, 2010