tit in a wringer

This is the last survivor of one of many "Haven't heard anything like that since Grandma (Grandpa) ..." expressions that used to mean someone was overdramatizing their problems. Implied the person commented on was acting like a whiny old person. "Haven't heard anything like that since Granny got her tit caught in the wringer" was what you'd say when, e.g., a coworkers spent the morning complaining about someone having taken the last cup of coffee and not making a fresh pot.

"And everyone forgot to tell me that Awards Day is next week! Why doesn't anyone ever tell me? Doesn't anyone care ...." etc.

(whispered to friend) "Haven't heard anything like that since Granny caught her tit in a wringer."

(Alternatives that once were common) "Haven't heard anything like that since someone put a cherry bomb in Grandpa's truss."

"Haven't heard anything like that since Granny sat on the toilet plunger."

"Haven't heard anything like that since Grandpa got a turd stuck sideways."

by old lang guy September 18, 2008

tit monkey

A man who believes a cotton/spandex shirt will hold in his tits but doesn't; usually calling attention to said tits as well as pudgy arms and/or belly.

"Simon Cowell is such a Titmonkey!"

"Did you see that Titmonkey jiggling on the dancefloor?"

by bettie May 8, 2005

Cucumber Tits

When one's breasts are shaped like Cucumbers. They are long, hard, and green. I want to put them on a sandwich. Or In a salad. Yum.

Hey Zack! NICE CUCUMBER TITS!
"Thanks"

by McGee-Unit April 6, 2004

tits mcgee

Fat man that has big man tits

look at that tits mcgee he's really fat

by mr awesome/amazing June 1, 2010

COON TITS

1. Term you use to express anger to someone.

2. Name for a female who posses no funbags what-so-ever.

1. Hey coon tits give me back my missus!

2. Hey coon tits, are they milkable?

by clusterfuck May 13, 2005

tits up

Another way to say "You're dead".

"You're going down, man, tits up.

by Reddog500 August 8, 2006

Sausage Tits

Male breasts. Sausage because it's penis like.

Look at that fat guy. Damn, he's got some huge sausage tits.

by awefvbnmtresdfghj February 15, 2009