shitstache

When a police officer grows a mustache that went out in the seventies. For example Officer Ray Fox 5628.

Officer Fox:"License, registration, and insurance please ma'am."

Woman:"Wow! You scared the piss out of me with that ugly fucking shitstache. I thought you had treacher collins syndrome"

by Cheesedick Parade October 19, 2006

shitistics

The mathematical process by which one or a group measures the quality and size of their shits. A way to compare shits between competing friends/enemies. There is an average shit for humanity, as taken by Jesus Christ unto St. Peter's face (the Holy Shit), and shits greater than or less than the Holy Shit is measured by standard deviation in terms of chippermonkeys. Shitistics apply to size, girth, smell, denisty, color, and toilet clogging ability. Shitistics are measured by a neutral arbiter in a "who took the biggest shit" dispute.

Jason: Shit dude, I took a huge shit this morning.

Matt: What are the shitistics you shithead?

Jason: Size: 1.2 chippermonkeys, Girth: 3.8 chippermonkeys, Smell: 2.8 chippermonkeys, Density: -1.9 chippermonkeys, Color: 0.2 chippermonkeys, Toilet Clogging: 10.0 chippermonkeys.

Matt: I guess thats a decent shit.

Jason: Shit, I had to buy new socks.

Matt: Tell Craig to come measure the shitistics on the deuce I just dropped.

by Cream Puff69 October 13, 2012

Shiesty

To be a shiest

Adj: To be bogus toward someone or something.

Damn, that bro did me shiesty by stealin my shoes

by The Ay dog November 24, 2010

Oli Shites

Fairly unoriginal but extremely fitting nickname for the twattish lead singer of excuse for a band Bring Me The Horizon. Known to frequently piss on and bottle girls who dont want to have sex with him. Avoid at all costs.

do you know what that twat oli skyes should have been called? oli shites...

by adsgsd May 28, 2008

Shitstick

A tall or thin person that is devoid of any personality.

John: "Jimmy is such a shitstick!"
Frank: "I know, why would he shove a stick up his ass?"

by Pixelasia December 11, 2018

Talking Shitstain

Someone who brags and talks a lot of shit to appear big infront of his friends, gf, and buddies. Desperately trying to hide his own insecurties and believing in his own hype.

Tommy talks so much shit, and that fat fuck believes in his self hype what a talking shitstain he is. Always talking when no one wants to listen.

by rogerW November 8, 2009

shitstick

A long stick usually used to pick up pieces of faecal matter by jabbing and lifting, then usually thrown or dropped somewhere. Is very disgusting and smelly. Can also be used as part of an insult about someones breath.

"Fuck sake Joe, did you brush your teeth with a shitstick?"

by Digney July 5, 2006