Zombie Stroking

-When a person has been up for at least three days masturbating while using Crystal Meth.

Yea last night was fun but I went home and been Zombie Stroking all night.

by EARTH/RABBIT March 19, 2011

stroking the puppy

A euphemism for female masturbation, often accompanied with the words "squatting down" in front of it.

Dylan: She was squatting down, stroking the puppy!
Grace: Holy shit, right in the park in front of everyone?

by mcspiff January 27, 2011

Shrekism

The one and only superior religion where long ago a powerful being named shrek created the universe and about 4.3 billion years ago he created the earth but it was a giant swamp and the only life was plants and ogres and donkeys. eventually some of these ogres evolved to become what is now known as humans and the earth changed too causing swamps to be a lot less common then they used to. Some ogres stayed isolated and did not evolve. the last known ogres seen around 400 years ago but some theories suggest that they have a colony of ogres still thrive on slugs and eyeballs deep under swamps. This theory is highly supported since nobody has seen any evidence of ogre remains so they are likely hiding and waiting to return. Anybody who opposes this belief is a lord farquaad supporter and should be thrown in the lava that surrounds the dragons castle. There are many variations of shrekism but they all revolve around the belief that the all mighty shrek controls everything that exists. Some believe it is possible to summon shrek by tying a donkey to a tree in a swamp surrounded by onions and chanting “what are you doing in my swamp” over and over while playing All star by smash mouth from a CD player that was manufactured in 2001. Many people have tried this but nobody has succeeded in summoning shrek because the conditions have to be absolutely perfect and it is still very difficult.

It was very easy to convert my Christian friend into a shrekist because of how much more sense shrekism makes

by Ur mom's shrek hentai April 21, 2019

Shookith

Shaken, flustered, shook, Blake Cedric

Jessica used the last of the toilet paper after knowing I had Indian food earlier that day. I am shookith!

by Shookith March 8, 2017

stroking the roadkill

Female masturbation, enough said.

Jane couldn't get a date for months, so she spent her time home alone, stroking the roadkill.

by Schmiffy November 9, 2009

heat stroking

A masturbatory technique in which the subject masturbates with their left hand while placing their right hand under warm water. Then directly before orgasm you switch hands for a grand finale.

Heat stroking is kind of hottt sexxx.

by Reid C May 4, 2008

Stroking Johnson

Male masturbation.

Ignorant Donkey was sitting home stroking Johnson, while I was in the Dominican Republic getting laid.

by BobbyWaves August 21, 2016