Guaranteed TD

Used as a phrase stemming from NCAA Football 2006 in which someone is so good at the game that before the ball is snapped, they are so confident in the play's potential success, they simply say: "Guaranteed TD." (guaranteed touchdown)

The phrase is then used whenever someone is confident about any other ocurrence in one's life about to take place.

Scenario is usually posed as a question, followed by "Guaranteed TD" at the very end.

Can also be used in shortened notation: i.e. "GTD."

"2nd & 3?" "Defense in cover 2?" "Trips left?" "HB Direct? "Pulsating?"....GUARANTEED TD...or...real life example...Having some girls over eh? Beer pong? Watching a movie and cuddling after? pleeease....Guaranteed TD.

by Jimmy33 December 9, 2005

Grieser Guarantee

The Grieser Guarantee is a phrase used when you are one hundred percent positive that you are correct. First used by Eric Grieser, this guarantee can't be false.

"I Grieser guarantee that North Carolina is going to win the 2005 NCAA Championship Tournament."

by Eric Grieser April 12, 2005

Winger guarantee

A Jeff Winger alternative to a very important promise.

Invented in the tv show Community by Jeff Winger.

Jeff Winger: Il get you 5 more customers by the end of this, and that’s a Winger Guarantee

by FitnessGram™ Pacer Test December 22, 2021

guarana

A South American fruit, from which the seeds are used to make stimulants, and for some medicinal purposes(but really, who isn't really taking it just to get a rush?). It contains 4 or 5% caffeine (coffee has about 1%) and is found in many energy drinks, and is also sold as a powder that is mixed into drinks.

after drinking all that coffee with guarana powder in it, i was up for days!

by dan July 15, 2004

Action guaranteed

1. When the opposite sex of you has enough alcohol to give you some action. (derived from satisfACTION Guaranteed

I think that if Larissa has 4 beers it will be action guaranteed.

by krillo May 11, 2006

Oklahoma Guarantee

A guarantee that isn't really a guarantee. Usually consists of "I'll be damned if it doesn't work," "if it breaks, you can call me a son of a bitch," and "if it breaks in two, you can keep both the pieces!"

Comes from the days when unscrupulous Oklahoma used car dealerships would give unscrupulous warranties that were worth the paper they were printed on. These were the days before lemon laws.

The term has been popular in Texas and Oklahoma, but has some limited nationwide use.

Products made in China come with the Oklahoma Guarantee.

by therealelizacat December 14, 2013

guaranteed

A term incredibly overused in advertising.

"OMFG!!! SATISFACTION GUARANTEED!!!!!!1!1!11111!!one"

by idonthavaname October 5, 2006