crumpet

a sexy person

she's a nice bit of crumpet

by lex dex April 18, 2003

crumpet

word to describe a good looking female

"she was a good bit of crumpet"

by Fluffage September 9, 2008

Crumpeting

A British public school tradition generally practised by the upper classes, in which a crumpet is super-heated, covered in butter, and thrust between the buttocks of a chosen schoolboy. Often used as an initiation ritual. The crumpetee is expected to clench the hot crumpet between their buttocks as the butter runs down their backside, burning them. Should they allow the crumpet to fall, a greater punishment is often chosen.

This tradition is also practised among young gentleman's dining clubs and junior commissioned ranks of the military.

"I say, old boy! If Jenkins is to join this dining club, I expect him to tolerate a jolly harsh crumpeting!"

by Gizchern May 14, 2009

crumpets

a delicous british delicacy that braden has yet to try

my god fergus these crumpets are magnificent

by newcastleunited#1 January 2, 2010

Crumpets

1) a biscuitty thingy peoples eat in England.
2) an STD similar to crabs, but like, different.

1) I will eat your soul for brunch with tea and crumpets!
2) Holy hell, that whore gave me crumpets!

by moony November 18, 2003

crumpet

1. noun - word to substitute for the effectionaty application of the word "cunt"
2. noun - a piece of ass.
3. noun - referring to a person in power that has the best intentions, but often fails miserably at everything they do. Usually preceded by the word "Captain"

1. I wouldn't mind filling her crumpet with a wad of my love honey.
2. Check out the crumpet on that walking spit roast.
3. If Captain crumpet doesn't start Stumpy Stu on the bench this game, I'm going to shove a stick up his ass and use him as a toilet brush.

by dero-licked December 16, 2004

Crumpets

An exclamation used instead of a curse word. (i.e. Crap, Dammit, etc.)

Sandra: Oh crumpets! i dropped my phone in the toilet!

by whatdidshejustsay? October 24, 2010