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asscastle

When your ass crack sweats and gets all salty and the dry salt leaves a crusty residue.
Hey man, I just went jogging for ten miles. To you want to lick my asscastle.
by Jocko Johnson March 11, 2004
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arsecandle

someone who looks like they've got a candle up their arse, or would certainly enjoy the experience
dave you fucking arsecandle!
by JB October 25, 2003
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Asshanded

The past tense description of having your ass handed to you.

Frequently used in spofo, a sports forum on craigslist, or its' evil twisted product of incest step sister: forum 1006
Dude, you just got asshanded, AGAIN.

Well, we asshanded the "Trifecta" yet again today, you can tell when he starts posting more and more.

Why does Inshannityboi keep telling me I'm asshanded, when all I said was hello?
by trollertroller December 8, 2011
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AssCancer

Oh no, I have AssCancer. Oh wait nevermind, it's just the trash game Spelunky.
by Puji69 October 10, 2016
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asscandy

the wonderful wonderment of a great ever loving scent of sweet putan jus mixed with ass flow like you will snort off of a gorgeous pair of cunt wrappers also known as panties
sniff sniff sniff Snuffy Sniff asscandy, out and in the ever loving tongue of extscy
by Lonny Joe Black December 16, 2007
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Hoe ass candle

A person who thinks that the HIV virus cannot be spread through oral sex due to the harsh environment of the mouth. Originally from Yik Yak at the University of Waterloo.
"Who's hoe ass candle? I want her kik!"
by Hoeasscandle69 March 11, 2016
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assCandler

Someone who uses their rectum to drip melted wax and fill the contents of, then cleverly placing a wick down the center to make it work correctly, before it dries. Once dry, producing the candle, for a friend. Oftentimes, a pair of forceps would be recommended (for ass expansion assistance purposes). Please do not try this at home and if you do, you have been WARNED: this will burn the shit out of you, literally!

IN A METAPHORIC SENSE:
This is the idea of one who makes ass candles for others. Simply put: it is something given to someone that The giver thinks it is of worth and the receiver finds useless of repulsive; its not done in sarcasm nor humor alone, if humor is present, the humor would be accompanied by Spite or jealousy, often in comparison to the gifts conjured up by a narcissist and/or foe, or enemy, but not limited to. A shitty way of showing care toward someone they have reason to care about, yet they are either aware or unaware of how this idea comes across to the receiver. It is obviously not that somebody pours hot wax into the rectum but it is a way of calling somebody such, in order to properly describe them!
My aunt is so unpersonalized and careless it's not that she's cheap she has money but she just doesn't give a shit about any of us, instead she kind of shits on us for Christmas, she's such an assCandler. Like anyone wants this!
by Thynx_Twyyx@phyraxathon February 6, 2024
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