Mother I'd Like To Fuck. Also known as ILTFMM (I'd like to
fuck my mother).
A MILF is someone who....
1) Makes your penis erect when you know she shouldn't.
2) Spoils
friendships. Telling your best friend you'd like to fuck their mother will only cause arguments.
3) Brings a father and son together. You can both talk about how much you'd like to have sex with the woman in question.
4) Makes you start
masturbating, or, makes you masturbate even more
5) If she ignores you, you start having rape fantasies.
6) Makes you start looking at your own mother in a new light.
7) You hope is a pedophile or into the "younger kid" depending on age
8) Is to blame for you exposing yourself to her, being beat up by her, her husband AND your friend.....plus being arrested by the police.
9) Makes
you go with the neighbourhood slut just to fantasise it's the MILF you're having sex with.
10) Turns you into a criminal, and you find yourself breaking into her house and discovering a new pastime called "panty sniffing".
"
I'm sorry your mom died. I'm going to really miss her. Expecially with her being a MILF"
"Mom,
I'm sorry I slipped my hands between your legs when you were asleep. But I'm so in love with a MILF, I needed to touch your vagina and pretend it's hers"