Skip to main content

Creeping Jesus

Originally used in Ireland to describe a Catholic making a public display of religiosity simply for show.
Nowadays it refers to those who put on a big act to impress people, hypocritically. They creep around pumping hands and grinning like goons, oozing compliments and uttering clichés, all the while dying for a chance to stab you in the back. If you work with one you'll see people getting fired in their wake, and don't be surprised if you're next.
That Creeping Jesus charmed information out of me and then told the boss everything I said, to get me sacked, and he did the same to ten others.
Creeping Jesus by Winston Ryder September 6, 2007
Creeping Jesus mug front
Get the Creeping Jesus mug.
See more merch

jew for jesus 

An example of a jew for jesus is Jesus.
jew for jesus by briefandtothepoint September 30, 2006

High School Jesus 

A high school phemomenon, where every high school in America(and possibly other countries), has a guy who has a beard and long hair, looking like the lord himself. Usually an upperclassmen, and usually looked up to by peers.
Trev is our High School Jesus

big butter jesus 

best type of jesus, off i-75 in ohio, jesus really is fucking huge, and looks like buttter.
Big Butter Jesus

Sweet Creamy Jesus
big butter jesus by Lukis November 13, 2006

Raptor Laser Jesus 

It is essentially Raptor Jesus with a mounted helmet laser.
Did you see that!?

See what?

Raptor Laser Jesus!

You mean Raptor Jesus?

*FaicPalm*
Raptor Laser Jesus by HeilRapJesus69 September 9, 2010

raving with jesus 

Overdosing on club drugs etc., therefore dying and going to heaven to roll with Jesus.
- I told Julie not to do that last line.
- It's OK, man. She's raving with Jesus now.
raving with jesus by hayzeussss January 7, 2011

Fuck me Jesus 

(1) A really bad turn of events. In addition to the established 'Fuck me' which denotes a bad turn of events, 'Fuck me Jesus' emphasizes a greater deal of anguish and bad luck, some would say on a biblical level. The beginnings of a holy shitfest.

(2) A girl making love to someone named Jesús (Spanish) and can't get over the fact that his name in English is Jesus.
Dude 1: "Hey, are we OK with the math exam? Does someone know we had a copy beforehand?"

Dude 2: "You are fucking kidding me, right?! Didn't you hear they caught us on the security cameras sneaking into the teacher's room."

Dude 1: "Oh! Damn! Fuck me Jesus!"
Fuck me Jesus by maxi215 September 7, 2012