absolutely fucked

When you're in a bad situation where you'll most likely fail or get the negative result.

A great example is when you're near the finish line in Mario Kart while being a tight race and someone uses the blue shell.

"The project's due tomorrow?! Man I am absolutely fucked!"

by A Saturated Meatball November 20, 2016

absolutliest

The most definite measurement according to Rob.

What is the absolutliest time Lebron can make his decision?

by jgold89 July 11, 2014

Absolute Croissant

A less harsh way of insulting someone by using food as cover to your overly attached persona to swear words.

Person 1: "I think the moon landing was faked"
You: "Please shut your face, you absolute croissant"

by Don'tknowwhatyou'retalkingbout May 22, 2016

Absolute spice

A good looking lass/a fit lass

That lass looks absolute spice

by Absolute spice January 5, 2018

AbsoluteCUCKERY

When you witness a DENSE-ASS guy, miss all the "Hints" from a chick who is clearly into him.

Jamie: Yo, dude i saw Michelle talking to Andrew about coming over to have "fun" at her place, late at night
Frank: What did Andrew say about that?
Jamie: Dude, he said he would rather sleep at night then have fun
Frank: WOWWWW, now that's AbsoluteCUCKERY

by LiquongDaemingSwing March 14, 2018

absolute ape

Some on who acts like a retard and try a to be funny but makes retarded jokes. Most people that are absolute apes are Daniel Bailey, and people like him

Absolute ape is a person who is retarded

by JimmyJohmsSubs June 27, 2018

absolute lass

A all around good jolly lassie. She's got your back and is sassy as all hell. The abosulte package.

That Peyten is an absolute lass! I love being around her.

by Theabsoluteunit July 2, 2018