Ass Crumpet

Ass crumpet, any trailing or leftover winnets, clegs etc, used to offend people who literaly deserve to be on someone'e arse

God James whittington! Your a proper ass crumpet you are!
(and you are)

by Matty D! April 17, 2004

Crumpety

Recreational sex with no pain or humiliation, just good sex with no next morning analysis

Bluebell needed her crumpety and Bumski was only too happy to oblige her with a good hard joyous fuck.

by Bumski December 20, 2002

crumpet chunking

this is where a person will choke on a greedy mouthfull of crumpet and proceed to puke it back up in large pieces

Q. Where is Kev?

A. He is in the kitchen crumpet chunking his greedy face off!!!

by smiler2 July 26, 2009

crumsturbating

crying, taking a dump, and masturbating at the same time

after getting pWned, Todd was in the bathroom crumsturbating for a few hours

by stillberry November 25, 2010

Crumpet boy

Crumpet boy saves the world (specifically England) from negativity tea drinking experience. He has worked his entire life at this important beautiful job! He should be proud to cause so much joy for England in this time of Brexit. Amongst other of the country’s many horrors he has restored hope in the country’s eyes!

Look it’s crumpet boy he will help us to feel slightly less miserable while we await BREXIT

by Iminclassrightnow June 9, 2019

T-bag and crumpets

The act of T-bagging someone or something and leaving pubic lice on or above there eye line/on there eye brow(s).

Jenny:Damn it!!......
Person: What?
Jenny: I had to shave me eyebrows last night.
Person: Why?
Jenny: Because i had some T-bag and crumpets last night.
Person: Oh, well at least it was just your brother that gave you the lice. It is nasty to get lice from people you don't know.

by TwistedFaith June 6, 2010

Buttering the crumpet

to ejaculate semen onto a partners anus

after gaining my brown wings, i enjoyed buttering the crumpet

by Ginger kite sack June 14, 2011