bert

another word for sayin not

im home alone and scared, bert

by ?:>"{}| April 17, 2009

Bert Squirt

The same exact technique as giving a woman the shocker. But the person giving the Bert Squirt is missing part of their pinky finger. Therefore instead of " Two in the pink and one in the stink", it is Two in the pink and half in the stink. This technique is satisfying to both partners because the partner on the receiving end is enjoying a half pinky with no fingernail being lodged up her butthole, while the partner on the giving end is feeling the woman's stink wrinkles pucker like a hummingbird heart all over his damaged nerve endings sending them both into squirt mode.

I gave my wife the Bert squirt last night, now the ceiling in our bedroom looks like a jackson pollock painting with a black light on!

by Chingycheeze August 20, 2021

bert

The funniest youtuber in the world who primarily makes short Spongebob YouTube Poops. He makes the characters say different things from the original episode usually resulting in a sexual reference such as when he made Mr. Krabs say "get that suit on sailor! It's already been cummed on!" instead of the original, "it's already been paid for!", in the episode where Pearl takes over the Krusty Krab and gives them the crazy onesie uniforms where Squidward says, "rage, fury, irritation, humiliation,". That's just one hilarious example. He is a talented voice actor who gets the character's voices almost spot on and also manipulates the speeds and movements of the characters to make them look like they're saying what he wants them to say. Most of his videos have been taken down unfortunately due to Viacom saying that he was violating copyright laws. He has about 60,000 subscribers.

Squidward: "Now, repeat after me! bert's edits are so good!"
Spongebob: "bert's edits suck dick!"
Squidward: "AAAAAAAAHHHHH!" (throws mirror)

by HouCou2003 November 3, 2022

bert

A disabled piece of shit, usually very rude. Always wears a hat and sits in his chair.

has a fine mom though

bert is a bad person
you see bert? he’s disabled.

by momsaremylife March 21, 2024

Bert Alert

When an emergency meeting is called and you get a boner

Shit! uhhhh... bert alert...

by Bert alert October 28, 2020

Bert's Law of Forgetful Transactions

The probability of a finance manager forgetting to collect the down payment that is directly proportional to the size of the down payment and inversely proportional to the memory capacity of the involved manager.

I saw the finance manager running after a customer realizing that Bert's Law of Forgetful Transactions had taken place.

by K9 _Cop May 22, 2024

Ska-Bert

The act of stealing someone's handshake

Person 1: Hey nice to meet you *Attempts to give the person a handshake*
Person 2: Nice to meet you too *Goes to give him a handshake*
Person 3: SKA-BERT *Gives person 1 the handshake instead*

by Spazzzattack25 February 14, 2019