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Masturbation

Don't knock masturbation -- it's sex with someone I love.

Woody Allen in Annie Hall, 1977
by mandingoe November 8, 2005
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Mental Masturbation

The act of looking up the term "Mental Masturbation". You should have better things to do. Now go do it! Geez!!!
I knew I was wasting time thinking about things that didn't amount to anything useful. So I wondered if I was the only. I looked up "Mental Masturbation" and confirmed it.
by XAlterEgoX December 13, 2015
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Mutual masturbation

Usually practiced in homosexual couples, but it is also done between some straight couples as foreplay.
When you lay down with someone, get in a cuddle type position and mastubate with them.
Some people make out with the person while they do it.
As I laid there, jerking my cock, at the sight of her masturbating next to me, she leaned over and started to make out with me.
This mutual masturbation thing is great!
by Demonic bro December 10, 2013
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Mental Masturbation

The act of engaging in useless yet intellectually stimulating conversation, usually as an excuse to avoid taking constructive action in your life.
Guy 1: "If only I had taken Cindy to my high school prom, I could have fucked her instead of that loser Jeff and then now she would be my girlfriend."

Guy 2: "Dude, stop that mental masturbation right now and go out and meet a new girl!"
by SweetP April 12, 2005
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Masturbation

a way to stay faithfulto your girl.

you do it cause: youre horny/bored/to kill time/just because its a habit.
masturbation is a great way to relieve horniness or just cause youre bored.
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masturbation

1. America's number one past-time.
2. Reasons why many kittens die.
1.
Dude 1: "Dude you wanna go party or something?"
Dude 2: "Nah... I'm gonna participate in the great American past-time."
Dude 1: "Ahh... masturbation."

2.
Dude 1: "Dude that kitten just died."
Dude 2: "Ahh shit, I shouldn't have masturbated last night."
by thewhorewhoisjerome August 4, 2007
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masturbationpiece

A specific collage of porn images and video which are perfectly arranged on one or more computer screens in order to achieve masturbatory perfection.
My most recent creation had two looped video clips and four different images on two monitors. Each video was centered on its own monitor and was bordered by two images. Clips were edited to eliminate all chances of a misfire, and images were cropped to remove any useless sections. It was a dual monitor full screen utilization Masturbationpiece.
by Smith Master February 23, 2011
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