the job's fucked/knackered

Despite your best efforts, a task or assignment has met with total failure.

' I've tried everything, but it's not going to happen.The job's fucked/knackered'.

by Finbarthebad August 18, 2007

knock on wood

1. A phrase used to express that something will or will not happen. This expression alludes to the ages-old superstition that literally knocking on wood would ward off evil spirits.
2. To masturbate, said of males.

(made-up scene from GTA San Andreas)

(at the beach)

Kent Paul: (ogling a hot girl come out of the water) Oi Maccer, just take a look at what just breezed out of the blue. That height, that arse, those jugs, those curves! Blimey if I'd be given the chance now I'd get to chuck my junk in that, knock on wood!
Maccer: Indeed man! Knock on wood, eh. Well alright then! *starts masturbating*
Kent Paul: No, jack-off Jimmy, not... ohh, *mumbles* fucking Northeners!

----------------
Mark H. Proud Urban Dictionary slang author since February 2004.

by Mark H October 10, 2005

knock up

to get a girl pregnant out of marriage(to get pregnant)

It is bad to get knocked up, you know that baby is gonna be messed up.

by katiecutie153 December 25, 2004

knock and roll

To ejaculate on one side of a double bed, then to roll over to the other side, allowing the love juice to dry before sleep. (a lazy man's wank)

"im going upstairs to practice some knock and roll".

by warb October 24, 2004

knock my socks off

To feel so excited by someone that fireworks go off when you’re near him or her

I should never have been with him in the first place. He just didn’t knock my socks off or anything.

by BrownSugar7 November 4, 2017

Whappy Knacking

When your masterbating with no porn and it takes like 20 minutes to get off and you keep switching hands because your forearms are burning.

"I was so bored, that I decided to start Whappy Knacking on my couch."

by Slappy Fack November 30, 2006

knock the checks off your nikes

beat somebody up till that cant see straight

Dont fuck wit me i'll knock the checks off your nikes

by Two-Ohh April 30, 2006