piss on my chips and tell me it's vinegar.

This is a 'mangled metaphor'. It mixes up 3 idioms:

Piss on my leg and tell me it's raining
Piss on one's chips
Piss and vinegar

To deliberately and painstakingly go out of one's way to ruin a friend's chances of success. Usually done jokingly with reference to the opposite sex.

No way do I want you as my wingman. You would piss on my chips and tell me it's vinegar.

by fuguez September 26, 2009

telly tubbies

Result of old aged pensioners on acid.

Four round furry creatures, that dance and babble in Telly Tubby land. They are:

Dipsy = green with a spike on head.
Laa-Laa = yellow with curly pig tail on head.
Po = Red with a small halo.
Tinky-Winky = purple with a purple coat hanger on head.

In Telly Tubby Land, the Sun is baby faced, always shining and gurgling. Whie trabbits much verdant grass and never shite. Or maybe Noo-Noo the giant vacuum cleaner eats rabbit shite.

Every half hour every day the windmill turns and flashes coloured sparks, and one of the TV stomach turns on and a little show usu. involving little children doing activity, this happens twice, then they prance about a bit, and they jump back into the dome.

Old Bertie ate his son's tabs and saw some telly tubbies.

by Kerb November 28, 2004

Not telling

not disclosing information for personal or private reasons.

"Hey, what is your middle name?"
"Not telling."

by TexaSmarty August 7, 2008

I don't know what to tell you

A phrase used to tell another person to politely say, "I have no interest in continuing this conversation or listening to you complain." In its hardly ever used long form, it would be used as, "I don't know what to tell you to get you to shut up." Extensively used when people present you with a problem, you offer advice to them on viable solutions, but they come up with excuses why they can't follow your advice.

Person A; "complain, complain, complain. My car broke and I can't get to work now. And boss says he'll fire me if I miss another day!"
Person B; "Take the bus."
Person A; "There's no bus route within a quarter mile, and my feet hurt so much."
Person B; "Take a cab."
Person A; "I can't afford a cab with these car repair bills!"
Person B; "I don't know what to tell you."

by Edward C. Microwagious IV May 31, 2010

William Tell

A game where one person tries to shoot an apple or other similar object off the head of another person without hurting them.

"Joan Vollmer was killed by her husband while playing 'William Tell'."

by Knightsgate May 29, 2014

your trousers are so tight i can tell your religion

when your trousers are so tight you can see whether the person in question is circumcised

your trousers are so tight i can tell your religion

by petunia :- clements December 27, 2016

bank teller

1) The worst job ever.
2) Having to smell b/o all day and people's bad breath.
3) Human Computer who is expected to never make mistakes.

Charlotte: Hey Lauren, don't you just love your job as a BANK TELLER ?
Lauren: No I Effing hate this mutha fukin job.

by charlietuna January 15, 2009